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Humorous Quotes

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Humorous Quotes

“Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.”

“In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”

“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.”

“Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.”

Inspirational Funny Crazy Humorous Witty Silly Quotations

Author:Groucho Marx

“Room service? Send up a larger room.”

Inspiration Funny Rooms Crazy Humorous Witty Silly Room Service

Author:Groucho Marx

“Sometimes the person who is the most logical is the person whom we call insane.”

Persons Sometimes Funny Crazy Directors Humorous Madness Mad Insane Producers Insanity Logical Screenwriters Craziness Being Crazy Sometimes In Life

Author:Kevin Spacey

“Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.”

Source: Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist

“I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.”

Stills Reality Funny Fear Crazy Humorous Witty Meals Decent Funny Inspirational

Author:Groucho Marx

“This guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, Doc, my brother’s crazy. He thinks he’s a chicken. The doctor says, Well, why don’t you turn him in? And the guy says, I would but I need the eggs. Well I guess that’s pretty much how I feel about relationships. You know they’re totally irrational and crazy and absurd but I guess we keep going through it because, uh, most of us need the eggs.”

Thinking Knows Needs Feels Wells Guy Turns Crazy Brother Humorous Doctors Witty Absurd My Brother Eggs Chickens Keep Going Irrational This Guy Psychiatrist Annie Hall

Author:Woody Allen

“Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!”

May Inspiration Funny Wife Crazy Humorous Witty Silly Girlfriend Toasts Being Irish Ireland And The Irish Drinking Toast Irish Proverbs Funny Irish Irish Drinking

Author:Groucho Marx

“Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls.”

Years Two Girl Crazy Mines Taste Humorous Years Ago Two Years

Book:The Groucho Letters: Letters from and to Groucho Marx

Source: The Groucho Letters: Letters from and to Groucho Marx

“On second thought, I think I am more crazy than my goat.”

Thinking Funny Chance Crazy Humorous Madness Mad Insane Painter Insanity Second Chance Anarchist Goats Craziness Being Crazy Second Thoughts Crazy Girl

Author:Remedios Varo

“The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Source: Churchill By Himself