“There's no doubt about it, show business lures the people who didn't get enough love, attention, or approval early in life and have grown up to become bottomless, gaping vessels of terrifying, abject need. Please laugh.” PeopleNeedsEnoughShowsAttentionLaughingDoubtPleaseNo DoubtApprovalShow BusinessVesselLureEnough Love Author:Dennis Miller
“For the foreseeable future, we're going to need oil products because I don't like the idea of hydrogen cars. I'm not sure I want to be cruising around a mall parking lot filled with a thousand mini-Hindenburgs.” WantNeedsIdeasHumorFunnyCarProductsThousandFilledOilNot SureMallsParkingHydrogenParking LotHindenburg Author:Dennis Miller
“The very definition of the innate hollowness of leading a political life when you end up on your nearest and dearest moments or most personal evenings with donors. That should - that should tell you all you need to know about the ramble that is politics.” KnowsNeedsShouldEndsMomentsPoliticalDefinitionsEveningInnateDonorsPolitical LifeHollowness Author:Dennis Miller
“I don't need to be born again. I got it right the first time.” NeedsFirstsBornFirst TimeBorn Again Author:Dennis Miller
“I've grown fonder for Hillary Clinton since she ran for the presidency. I think that it's emblematic of the Rolling Stones song, you can't always get what you want, i.e., the grail. Sometimes you get what you need. And whatever she's gotten over the last couple of years, being humbled or be it being humbled and see the proletariat come to bat for her, getting outside of the bubble, getting out of this man's shadow, not quite getting the job she wants but a great wonk job.” ThinkingMenWantNeedsYearsSometimesJobsLastsSongCoupleShadowStonesClintonWhat You WantRanBubblesRollingBatsPresidencyBe HumbleRolling StonesProletariat Author:Dennis Miller
“Joan Rivers telling Lauren Bacall her dress is all wrong is like Carrot Top telling Lenny Bruce he needs to get an edge.” NeedsRiversDressesEdgesCarrotsLauren Book:Ranting Again Source: Ranting Again
“After 7 years of marriage, I am sure of 2 things: First, never wallpaper together and second, you'll need 2 bathrooms . . . both for her. The rest is a mystery, but a mystery I love to be involved in.” NeedsYearsFirstsTogetherMarriageMysteryCoupleInvolvedBathroomYears Of Marriage Author:Dennis Miller
“Of *course* he needs to renegotiate his salary - the guy buys more snow than Seward did when he bought Alaska from the Russians.” NeedsGuyCoursesFootballSnowSalaryAlaska Author:Dennis Miller
“Only man is a narcissistic enough species to think that a highly evolved alien life force would travel across billions and billions of light-years- a group of aliens so intelligent, so insouciant, so utterly above it all, they feel no need whatsoever to equip their spacecraft with windows so that they can gaze out on all that celestial beauty-but then immediately upon landing, their first impulse is to get in some hick's ass with a flashlight.” ThinkingMenNeedsFeelsYearsFirstsEnoughLightForceGroupsWindowIntelligentSpeciesBillionsAssAliensImpulseNarcissismNarcissisticCelestialLandingFlashlightsSpacecraftLight YearsHicksAlien Life Author:Dennis Miller
“We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head.” NeedsImportantSweetComing OutPlasticPez Book:Ranting Again Source: Ranting Again
“Maybe democrats will eventually turn on Obamacare when they realize you might need a photo I.D. to participate in the program.” NeedsMightTurnsPoliticsRealizingProgramDemocratTurn-onObamacare Author:Dennis Miller
