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Famous Joan Rivers Quotes
“keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.”
“I’ve had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware.”
“The only way I can get a man to touch me at this age is plastic surgery.”
“With age comes wisdom. You don't need big boobs to be feminine. Look at Liberace.”
“You know why I feel older? I went to buy sexy underwear and they automatically gift wrapped it.”
“I can't wear yellow anymore. It's too matchy-matchy with my catheter.”
“My breasts are so low, now I can have a mammogram and a pedicure at the same time.”
“At my funeral, I want Meryl Streep crying in five different accents.”
Source: I Hate Everyone...Starting with Me