“I always try to just be honest ... As opposed to artifice or manipulation.”
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Famous Demetri Martin Quotes
“Whenever I try to spell 'banana,' I feel stupid because I don't know when to end it.”
“To remove blood stains from your conscience try frozen margaritas.”
“To make even fewer friends try talking about politics as much as you talk about yourself.”
“If you are trying to impress a woman, leave any sort of show farting out of the equation.”
“To remove all credibility from what you're saying try wearing sunglasses on your forehead.”
“The best way to make somebody feel important is to try to assassinate them.”
Source: This Is a Book