“On Twitter, when someone would die, I would write a joke. Or if there's a tragedy, I would write a joke and tweet it. That was my thing, and then at a certain point, people started demanding it.” PeopleIfsWritingCertainDiesJokesTragedyTweet Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I want people to just be paying attention even if they're not necessarily laughing at something, or if it takes them a while to get something, I don't mind that. If half the crowd gets the joke and the other half is sitting there scratching their heads, that's just as good for me if I like the joke, because I feel like it just brings people in more.” PeopleIfsWantFeelsMindAttentionHalfLaughingJokesSittingCrowdsPay AttentionOther Half Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I was a terrible employee. I've been fired from almost every job I've ever had, luckily, in a good way, or else I'd be stuck. I would always joke around with everybody, and no one enjoyed my humor.” WayJobsTerribleJokesStuckEnjoyedEmployeeGood Way Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I was always cutting words. I even would write my jokes in my notebook. I still do this, almost like a poem.” WritingStillsCuttingJokesNotebook Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“One of my favorite things on the show was just getting to do my own monologue and talking about someone who killed themselves, or making a joke about some horrible tragedy - I love being able to fight for and get on TV. I just think it's so different.” ThinkingDifferentShowsAbleFightingMy OwnLove IsTalkingTvsJokesTragedyMy FavoriteHorribleFavorites ThingsMonologuesTalking About Someone Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“If I tell a joke on stage and the crowd laughs for a minute, I stand there for a minute and enjoy them laughing before I go on to the next joke. On TV, if I stand there for a minute while they laugh, I look like an idiot who can't remember the next joke.” IfsLooksRememberNextEnjoyLaughingMinutesStageTvsGoes OnJokesCrowdsIdiot Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“The one thing I've found you really can't joke about - and people think it's death or something - is money. No one thinks it's funny, whether you have it or you don't. Money is just something no one seems to like joking about.” PeopleThinkingSeemsFoundOne ThingJokesFound You Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“There is nothing that's off limits. If people think something is off limits, I make it my business to go make a joke about it; that's my job.” PeopleIfsThinkingJobsLimitsJokes Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I had written for Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman in the past. Jimmy had a different voice, and different priorities. He couldnt be the bad guy in the joke; he couldnt upset people, really.” PeopleDifferentPastGuyVoiceWrittenJokesPrioritiesUpsetBad GuysJimmyDifferent Voices Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“In the second grade, I would just get bored and a joke would pop into my head and I would have to say it. It was almost like I had some brilliant novel in my head that I had to get down, and I would interrupt class all the time and get in trouble.” ClassNovelTroubleJokesDown AndPopsBrilliantBoredGrades Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“Im not the voice of reason; Im more the guy using these offensive topics as fodder to raise tension in a joke.” ReasonGuyVoiceJokesRaisesTensionOffensiveTopicsFodderVoice Of Reason Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“Comedy Central made me delete the Boston Marathon joke. I wasn't happy about it but, despite popular belief, I can occasionally be a team player.” MadeI CanBeliefComedyPlayerTeamJokesDespiteBostonMarathonTeam PlayerBoston Marathon Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I didn't care about the backlash. I think the reason it was so severe was because they didn't know anything about me in New Zealand. If I had made jokes about a shark attack in the US, no one would have cared.” IfsThinkingKnowsMadeReasonCareJokesSevereSharksNew ZealandBacklashShark Attacks Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“It seemed fun to play a villain on stage and I wanted my jokes to be so good that I could just calmly tell them on stage.” PlayWantedFunStageJokesVillain Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I'm a comedian and there are a lot of things I'm still learning. I love one liners because I love smart jokes. I also don't like complaining about society or whining about my life on stage.” StillsStageSmartJokesComplainingComedianOne LinerWhiningOne Line Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I try to retire jokes as soon as I can once I put them on an album. But I can't think of anything I just stopped doing for no reason.” ThinkingTryingI CanReasonJokesAlbumsNo ReasonRetiring Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I try to write three jokes every morning, although I don't know what they are. I write them as fast as I can, then I put them away for a month. So I couldn't even tell you what they are, or if they're good. I just assume they weren't.” IfsKnowsWritingTryingI CanThreeMorningMonthsJokesAssumingEvery Morning Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“My girlfriend loves to eat chocolate. She's always eating chocolate. And she likes to joke she's got a chocolate addiction. You know, she'd be like keep me away from those chocolate bars, I'm addicted to them. And it's really annoying. So one day I put her in the car and I drove her downtown and I pointed out a crack addict. And I said you see that honey? Why can't you be that skinny?” SaidCarEatingJokesAddictionBarsLikesGirlfriendChocolateCracksHoneyAnnoyingAddictSkinnyMy GirlfriendDowntownEating ChocolateHersheyAlways Eating Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“Sure, retarded jokes write themselves. But the spelling is always way off.” WayWritingJokesSpellingRetarded Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I think a theater show is a pure version of me doing my material. The theater crowd is a bit more polite, there really aren't hecklers, and there are a lot of people there to see me, and they're excited about the jokes and hanging out with me for a show.” PeopleThinkingShowsBitsMaterialsPureJokesTheaterCrowdsExcitedVersionsHanging OutPoliteHecklers Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“You can't expect everyone to laugh or applaud you for doing edgy things. Sometimes you'll miss. But I think comedians are artists and there's a value in failure. It kind of works both ways between comedians and audiences. The audience has to understand that comedians are going to sometimes tell a joke that doesn't work out with dark subjects, and the comedian has to understand that sometimes they 'll fail and it's not the audience's fault for not getting it or loving it.” ThinkingWayKindSometimesArtistValuesDarkAudienceLaughingFailingSubjectsMissingJokesFaultsWork OutComedianEdgy Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“About a year after I moved to Los Angeles, I decided I wanted to be a joke writer for a late night talk show. So I met with a late night joke writer and he told me that I should start by doing stand-up comedy, because that would really hone my sense of humor and joke writing ability. Eventually I took a stand-up class and a few months later I had a seven-minute act.” ShouldWritingYearsShowsWantedNightAbilityClassComedyMinutesMonthsMetsLateJokesDecidedMovedSevenLos AngelesSense Of HumorTalk ShowsLate NightStand Up Comedy Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I'm really proud of the album. It's something I always wanted to do but I had to wait until I was ready. Shakespeare is a culmination of eight years of stand up experience and joke writing. I recorded two shows at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre in New York. The crowds were great and that's what really makes an album.” WritingYearsTwoShowsWantedWaitingNew YorkReadyProudCitizensJokesAlbumsCrowdsEightTheatreCulmination Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“Todd Glass has amazing energy on stage. Dave Attell is one of my favorites because he's a one liner comic who is always incredibly in the moment with the audience. As for newer people, I think Adrienne Iapalucci writes some great, dark jokes and Sean Patton has a hilarious voice on stage.” PeopleThinkingWritingMomentsEnergyVoiceDarkAudienceStageJokesGlassesComicOne LinerDaveSeanOne Line Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“Usually the beginning of a story that people hear a lot. For example, "My girlfriend is upset about her new haircut" or "My dad keeps losing his car keys." And then I just think of different ways the story could end. "My girlfriend is upset about her new haircut. I don't understand why she's crying. I'm the one who has to get a new girlfriend." Then I try it out on stage. I don't do a lot of re-writing. My jokes either work or they don't. The trick is just to write a ton of jokes.” PeopleThinkingWayWritingTryingDifferentEndsStoriesStageCarCryExampleKeysDadLosingJokesMy DadTricksUpsetDifferent WaysGirlfriendMy GirlfriendHaircutsCar KeysNew GirlfriendNew Haircut Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I would write 100 jokes a day. Most of them were terrible. But I just said, 'I'll write more than everybody else, and that's how I'll get better.'” WritingSaidTerribleJokesGet Better Author:Anthony Jeselnik
