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Jay Leno

Jay Leno Quotes

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Famous Jay Leno Quotes

“The Pennsylvania Game Commission has charged a man with going deer hunting with a handgun in a Wal-Mart parking lot. He is being charged with reckless endangerment, but may plead guilty to the lesser charge of being a redneck.... Hunting in a Wal-Mart parking lot. That's got to be some good eating — a deer that lives on leftover Twizzlers and Mountain Dew.”

MenMayGamesMountainEatingGuiltyHuntingRecklessDewRedneckDeerParkingPennsylvaniaParking LotHandgunsGood EatingDeer HuntingEndangermentMountain Dew
Author:Jay Leno
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“In Afghanistan, U.S. troops are now holding an American man who has been fighting alongside the Taliban. His mother says he was born in Washington, D.C. and his father's a lawyer. Well, that explains it. ... He surrendered to authorities and said he wants to go back to his old job - airline security guard.”

MenWantWellsHas BeensSaidJobsMotherFightingFatherBornSecurityAuthorityLawyerAfghanistanTroopsAirlineTalibanSecurity GuardsOld JobAirline Security
Author:Jay Leno
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“A new study finds that women use their whole brain when listening and men only use half of their brain. You see, men use the other half of their brain to come up with excuses. I don't think women use their whole brain when listening. I think they use half of it and the other half is used to memorize what men are saying so they can use it against them 10 years later!”

ThinkingMenYearsWholeUseUsedBrainHalfStudyListeningCome UpExcuseOther Half
Author:Jay Leno
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“The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.”

MenReasonRealityFunnyPoliticalThreeReligiousWiseSceneCourtSupremeChristmasVirginsSupreme CourtSantaVirginitySanta ClausInspirational ChristmasChristmas DayMerry ChristmasChristmas HolidayChristmas TreeChristmas EveFunny ChristmasXmasChristmas ThoughtsChristmas LoveShort ChristmasReligious ChristmasChristmas Card GreetingsChristmas Holiday GreetingsFunny Christmas CardFunny Merry ChristmasNativityChristmas PartyChristmas CheerBelieve In SantaHumorous ChristmasGreat ChristmasFunny HolidayHoliday CardReligious HolidayBelieving In ChristmasClassic ChristmasWinter ChristmasWitty ChristmasFamily ChristmasMerry Xmas FunnyHoliday CheerThree Wise Men
Author:Jay Leno
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“Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!”

MenTodayFunnyRomanticSarcasticValentineValentine's DayFunny LoveSinglesFunny Valentines DayRomantic Valentines DayFunny ValentineSt ValentineHappy Valentines DayHappy Valentines Day FunnyValentine PhrasesBe My ValentineSweet ValentineAnti ValentineFunny Single Valentines DayAnti LoveAnti Valentines DayCute ValentineExtortionFunny Anti Valentines DaySingle PeopleShort Valentines DayFunny Valentines Day CardShort ValentineFunny Anti LoveFunny Being SingleHumorous ValentineSingle StatusCute Funny Valentines Day
Author:Jay Leno
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