Source: The Hero's Lot
Funny Love Quotes
Browse 220 quotes about Funny Love.
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Funny Love Quotes
“Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.”
“Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.”
“I want a man who's kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire?”
“I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.”
“If I had no sense of humor I should long ago have committed suicide.”
“The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.”
“When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.”
“You can't make someone love you, all you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in”
“When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second.”
“I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?”
Source: Self Esteem A Family Affair
“Hate is funny. Love isn't. Love can kill you. Hate can keep you alive.”
“Thousands have lived without love, not one without water.”
Source: Juvenilia: Poems, 1922-1928
“The perfect lover is one who turns into a pizza at 4:00 A.M.”
“Well, you know, the definition of second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.”
“Like good wine, marriage gets better with age - once you learn to keep a cork in it.”
“What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.”
Source: The Snake Has All the Lines
“If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books.”
“First love is a kind of vaccination which saves a man from catching the complaint the second time.”
“Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!”
“I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me.”
“When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life.”
“Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.”
“I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.”
“Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.”
“Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.”
“Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.”
“Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.”
Source: Cindy and I: The Real Life Adventures of Mr. and Mrs. Joey Adams
“Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.”
Source: A little book in C major