“'Master Blaster,' by Stevie Wonder, is up-tempo and fun, like Stevie himself. Stevie's always making jokes; he really knows how to put people at ease. He's one of my inspirations, as a musician and a person.” PeopleKnowsPersonsInspirationFunWonderKnow HowMastersMusicianJokesEaseTempo Author:Ziggy Marley
“I enjoy darker sardonic wit more than knock-knock jokes. I spent the first healthy chunk of my career playing all-American, pleasant, average, nice people, so it's fun to have some complications there.” PeopleFirstsFunEnjoyCareersNiceHealthyJokesAverageWitPleasantComplicationChunksNice PeopleSardonic Author:Neil Patrick Harris
“I'd always been scared of people with tertiary education and high intellects in case they found me wanting. I thought they viewed me as just a welder who knew a few jokes.” PeopleFoundCasesJokesScaredIntellect Author:Billy Connolly
“I don't think I ever wrote a song. I can write a lot of jokes, but when I try to write lyrics they're the most direct, non-figurative words, like, 'I like you, I like you,'... and that's it, for the whole song. People would go, 'Ooh, this guy's Dylan or something.' It gives me a lot more respect for songwriters, actually.” PeopleThinkingGivingWritingTryingI CanWholeGuySongLike YouJokesDirectGive MeSongwritersThis GuyDylanI Like You Author:Demetri Martin
“I started over again with an image: Nothing goes right. Then when The Godfather came out, all I heard was, Show respect. With me, you show respect. So I changed the image to I don't get no respect. I tried it out in Greenwich Village. I remember the first joke I told: Even as a kid, I'd play hide and seek and the other kids wouldn't even look for me. The people laughed. After the show, they started saying to me, Me, too - I don't get no respect. I figured, let's try it again.” PeopleTryingFirstsLooksPlayShowsKidsRememberHeardChangedJokesVillageLaughedNo RespectHide And SeekShow RespectGreenwichGreenwich Village Author:Rodney Dangerfield
“Sitting around with funny people, banging out jokes and creating a television show. I have no hobbies, no outside interests. I'm fine with spending 14 hours a day putting a show together with tape and string.” PeopleShowsTogetherInterestHoursTelevisionFineCreatingJokesSittingSpendingStringsTapeHobbiesTelevision ShowsSitting AroundBangingFunny People Author:Jon Stewart
“I think of myself as a comedian who has the pleasure of writing jokes about things that I actually care about, and that's really it. I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change, but I am far lazier than that.” PeopleIfsThinkingKnowsWritingTryingCareWantedSocialLinesPleasureFrontsJokesComedianSocial ChangeTrenchesGreat Respect Author:Jon Stewart
“Every joke has its origin - the punching people in the face joke. It hurts like hell to get punched in the face.” PeopleFacesHurtHellJokesIt HurtsPunching Author:Dane Cook
“If a handful of people look at the making of the film and realize, "Oh, my god!" It was so complicated. It was like doing quantum physics calculations every day while you're telling a joke. It was so insane! So, they can feel my pain.” PeopleIfsFeelsLooksPainFilmRealizingJokesComplicatedPhysicsInsaneQuantumHandfulCalculationsQuantum Physics Author:Rob Letterman
“A lot of people are actually surprised when I do open up my mouth and smile a little bit, and crack a joke and drink a beer.” PeopleLittlesBitsDrinkLittle BitJokesMouthsBeerCracks Author:Tim Kang
“When you people have a set up joke and the joke is set up straight and the words are just well written, I always say "C'mon, humans don't speak that way."” PeopleWayHumansWellsSpeakWrittenJokesWell Written Author:Will Gluck
“And there's so much extra material. I mean, I've certainly read as you asked about do I read reviews and stuff, like people are like none of the jokes in the trailers are like in the movie. And it's like and we have whole sequences and scenes that weren't in the movie.” PeopleMeanWholeStuffMaterialsSceneJokesExtrasReviewsSequenceTrailers Author:Nicholas Stoller
“I'm fascinated by mankind. I grew up watching 'Candid Camera' and thought it was funnier than any standup, any joke, anything that could possibly be written because you're dealing with humanity. And people can relate to that. It touches everybody who sees it. It hits a nerve.” PeopleHumanityWrittenMankindGrewGrew UpJokesCamerasRelateNervesFascinatedCandidCandid Camera Author:Howie Mandel
“A white lady came running up to me after a show. She goes, What gives you the right to do jokes about black people like that. And I'm like, Listen lady, my best friend is Cuban. And that's close enough.” PeopleGivingEnoughShowsRunningBlackWhiteJokesBlack PeopleMy Best FriendCuban Author:Daniel Tosh
“Thank you people that are laughing with your hand away from your mouth. That joke is clearly not for everyone, but I enjoy watching people that don't laugh make the people that do laugh feel shitty about themselves.” PeopleFeelsHandsEnjoyLaughingJokesMouths Author:Daniel Tosh
“I told a joke and people laughed and it was the best feeling. I knew I wanted to do this as a career. I never knew I could get such a high from telling a joke. There's something so extraordinary about having people listening to you and hanging onto your words - it's a great feeling.” PeopleFeelingsWantedCareersListeningJokesExtraordinaryLaughedGreat Feelings Author:Chris Tucker
“It's crazy because people expect you to be funny all the time and every day is not a funny day. I go to funerals and people are like 'tell a joke' and 'say one of your lines in a movie.' It's a funeral, man!” PeopleMenLinesCrazyJokesFuneral Author:Chris Tucker
“For a short period of time, I was like, I have these jokes and if people get them, they get them. And then eventually, I was like, Oh no. It's absolutely my job to convey to people why what I think is funny, is funny. The whole point of standup is to get the audience to understand your weird point of view.” PeopleIfsThinkingWholeJobsViewsAudiencePeriodsJokesPoint Of ViewYour Weird Author:Eugene Mirman
“I think a theater show is a pure version of me doing my material. The theater crowd is a bit more polite, there really aren't hecklers, and there are a lot of people there to see me, and they're excited about the jokes and hanging out with me for a show.” PeopleThinkingShowsBitsMaterialsPureJokesTheaterCrowdsExcitedVersionsHanging OutPoliteHecklers Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“Some comics don't like it when people talk during the set, and it does get a little bit annoying after awhile, but I basically let people dictate what jokes I'm going to do.” PeopleLittlesDoeBitsLittle BitJokesAnnoying Author:Gabriel Iglesias
“I bullshit on the phone all day with a variety of people discussing various projects, and occasionally write jokes.” PeopleWritingProjectsJokesPhonesVariousVarietyBullshitDiscussing Author:Al Madrigal
“Well, I am not always joking, sometimes I am serious. But some people always expect you to be funny. If you were like you are on stage, you would be obnoxious. With the jokes and the putdowns, I would need to take a break... juggle something.” PeopleIfsNeedsWellsSometimesWould BeBreakStageSeriousLike YouJokesObnoxious Author:Dom Irrera
“I am a product... I'm a comedian. I'm not curing cancer. In the end, I tell jokes. I make people laugh. I make sense out of ridiculous situations, but in the end, it's all about laughter. It's all about your cheek hurting, your stomach hurting.” PeopleEndsHurtSituationLaughingProductsLaughterJokesCancerRidiculousMake SenseComedianStomachCheeksMaking People Laugh Author:Carlos Mencia
“But there's times when I like to find the strange angles to something. People go, 'I heard a lot of jokes like that, but that's one of the most interesting takes I heard.' That's what I try to do.” PeopleTryingInterestingHeardStrangeJokesAngleMost Interesting Author:Godfrey
“It's interesting, once I have convinced people that, yes, I have a sister with a mental disability, the retard jokes really dry up, so I'm not sure how much retard humor is really going on out there, but I imagine there's a lot because it's a pretty safe group to make fun of. It's not like the Retards of America are gonna rise up and organize a protest. They're not gonna write letters. They only just recently got the Supreme Court to stop executing them.” PeopleWritingAmericaFunInterestingImagineGroupsSafeJokesLettersCourtConvincedSupremeNot SureDryProtestDisabilityOrganizeSupreme CourtRetardExecutingDry Up Author:Bonnie McFarlane
“When you're on stage performing stand-up, things only happen one time. I've done bits where I improv a joke, and people are dying. The next show, I try to repeat it, I can't do it. Because with the first audience that was our moment. It can't happen the same way again. We were all there: a certain type of people were at that show and we all got it.” PeopleWayTryingFirstsI CanDoneMomentsShowsHappensCertainNextBitsAudienceStageDyingTypeJokesPerformingRepeatsOne Time Author:J. B. Smoove
“The deepest motivation for a lot of artists is obviously the one they all share: their great fear they are a fraud. It's a joke. In my case the problem is not that I don't question myself. It's just that I question other people even more.” PeopleProblemArtistMotivationCasesShareJokesFraud Author:Philip-Lorca diCorcia
“I often joke that 100 years from now I hope people are saying, 'Dang, she looks good for her age!'” PeopleYearsLooksAgeJokes Author:Dolly Parton
“Catering on planes, like on British Rail, is a standing joke, but I don't really have a problem with it. I don't quite know what people expect.” PeopleKnowsProblemJokesStandingBritishPlanesRailCatering Author:Phil Collins
“I end up feeling like a spy in the house of ethnicity, you know? Because people will talk around me as they would talk around the people in their cultural group. So I get to hear all the secrets and jokes and you know, I'm a part of every community because of the way I look.” PeopleKnowsWayLooksEndsFeelingsHouseCommunitySecretGroupsJokesSpyEthnicity Author:Sherman Alexie
“Back in the day, if someone said that hip hop and rap was a fad, that was a joke to me because they just didn't know what they were talking about. In reality, there were so many people who didn't know what they were talking about it.” PeopleIfsKnowsSaidRealityTalkingJokesHip HopRapHipsHopsFadsBack In The Day Author:Jam Master Jay
“I was photographing the photographer Brassaï. He had very prominent eyes, like a frog's. As I focused my lens, he brought his hand up and pretended to focus his eye. It was a joke, but it added mystery to the picture. There's a sense of action in a very small world. Or with Allen Ginsberg there were people smoking cigarettes and in the smoke there's a sense of motion. It makes much out of very little.” PeopleWorldLittlesHandsEyeActionFocusMysteryJokesPhotographerFocusedSmokeHis EyesSmokingCigaretteLensesFrogsProminentHands UpSmoking CigarettesSmall WorldGinsberg Author:John Loengard
“I like when people are trapped in the joke, when there's no escape. I like to lead people down the wrong path and then trap them.” PeoplePathJokesTrappedTrapsWrong Path Author:Paul Mooney
“There's always someone who's going to interpret my material as racist, but it's not. Racism comes from intent and power. A racist will tell a joke about a group of people only when they're not in the room. I'll talk about a group of people only when they're in the room.” PeopleRoomsGroupsMaterialsRacismJokesRacist Author:Russell Peters
“I was a bit scared because I came from the acting world. There was a fear that people would think of me kind of as a joke. But really, people think of me as a country artist who can act. That's my favorite compliment.” PeopleThinkingWorldKindCountryArtistBitsActingJokesMy FavoriteScaredComplimentThink Of MeCountry Artist Author:Jana Kramer
“A lot of people live with no apparent means of support. I kind of envy the musicians up there. You're down here, busting your ass in Hollywood, and it's like Lily Tomlin's joke about the rat race - all you prove in the end is that you're a rat.” PeopleKindMeanEndsRaceSupportProveMusicianJokesHollywoodEnvyAssRatsLiliesRat RaceBusting Author:Kurt Voss
“Sometimes I joke around that if I weren't a musician, I would be a power lifter. I don't think people expect it from me because I'm little.” PeopleIfsThinkingLittlesSometimesWould BeMusicianJokes Author:Mirah
“I love New Zealand. Every time I'm in New Zealand someone makes a joke about it being mostly sheep, which I think is unfair, because it's mostly nice people. It's mostly nice people and really wonderful scenery.” PeopleThinkingNiceWonderfulJokesSheepUnfairSceneryNew ZealandNice People Author:Patrick Stump
“I'm a goof. I talk too much. I tell stories. I tell cheesy Dad jokes. I'm theatrical and I'll mix things up and I'll surprise people. Those are the things that I just do because that's who I am.” PeopleStoriesToo MuchDadJokesSurpriseWho I AmTheatricalCheesyGoofs Author:William Beckett
“I got to draw shapes. I really like to draw funky, geometric shapes. And I got to use just different fonts and make a joke of how feminine it was, but it didn't even have people in it. To me, it was so exciting and interesting to do that for a while.” PeopleDifferentUseInterestingShapesDrawsJokesExcitingFeminineFunkyGeometricFontsGeometric Shapes Author:David Rees
“I did it a little bit in college, but now I've been doing it more. But yeah, it's not, I think you can definitely have a sense of humour about it. Like a lot of the time I'll finish my set with 'Sandstorm' by Darude - do you know that song? That's a funny song. People also go apeshit when you play it. But at the same time, it's not like the whole thing is a joke.” PeopleThinkingKnowsLittlesPlayWholeSongBitsCollegeHumourLittle BitJokesYeahDo You KnowSandstormsFunny Song Author:Chris Baio
“Sometimes my humor does offend people, and I've said it before: I don't write jokes to be offensive. I write jokes to be funny, and I guess what I find funny are things that other people sometimes find offensive. I would love nothing more than to never offend anyone, but it just doesn't seem to work out that way.” PeopleWayWritingDoeSaidSometimesSeemsJokesWork OutOffensive Author:Moshe Kasher
“Brian Posehn went up at 4:45 in the morning. And he gets lost at a certain point. I don't know if we kept him getting lost on the CD. That joke isn't as technically well delivered as I'm sure it is in his Comedy Central special. But the whole disk has this looseness and flavor to it where anything can happen that a lot of people will prefer.” PeopleIfsKnowsWellsWholeHappensCertainLostMorningComedySpecialJokesFlavorCdsBrianAnything Can HappenGetting LostDiskLooseness Author:B. J. Porter
“And usually I'm not watching the screen. I'm kind of sitting and looking off to the side, spying on people to see what they react to' cause it's - as Joe Ranft used to say, you know, animation is like telling a joke and waiting for three years to see if anyone laughs” PeopleIfsKnowsYearsKindUsedThreeCausesWaitingSidesLaughingJokesSittingScreensThree YearsAnimation Author:Pete Docter
“Authenticity seems like sort of a joke. Actually I believe it was the late comedian George Burns who said, "if you can fake sincerity, you've got it made." People cannot be invariant across situations and roles and, moreover, leaders need to be true not to themselves, but to what others want, need, and expect from them.” PeopleIfsWantNeedsBelieveMadeSaidSeemsI BelieveSituationLeaderRolesLateJokesAuthenticityBeing TrueComedianFakeSincerity Author:Jeffrey Pfeffer
“I think the biggest shift for me is - this is going to sound like a wanky actor, but - getting in touch with, and learning to not just appreciate, but actually really enjoy being a woman. Because for so long I was a jock, and I was an athlete, and I was a tomboy, and people would joke about like, fancy dress, you should go as a girl.” PeopleThinkingShouldLongGirlActorsEnjoySoundJokesAppreciateDressesAthleteFancyBeing A WomanJocks Author:Zoe Bell
“I use a lot of humor, and I follow the saying that if you want to tell people the truth, you better make them laugh first, otherwise, they will shoot you. So I can tell you a joke and maybe you will laugh at the beginning. But it's not about telling jokes.” PeopleIfsWantFirstsI CanUseLaughingJokes Author:Sayed Kashua
“I always like to think I build in historically accurate musical in-jokes that are so precise that like maybe there's 7 or 8 people in the world watching the show that will sit up and go, "Oh my God the music being played is the right kind of music!"” PeopleThinkingWorldKindShowsMusic IsJokesMusicalAccuratePreciseBeing Played Author:Bear McCreary
“There's a joke in the movie...it's got a fairytale ending, and this is a spoiler: Donald Trump does contract HIV. I think people are upset about that, mainly because they feel the reputation of AIDS has been destroyed by associating it with Donald Trump.” PeopleThinkingFeelsDoeHas BeensTrumpJokesAidsReputationDestroyedUpsetContractsHivFairytaleSpoilersFairytale Ending Author:Sacha Baron Cohen
“What sort of difficulties would happen when people of different cultures try to come together to worship? Tiny little things such as let's tell jokes with each other.” PeopleTryingLittlesDifferentHappensTogetherCultureWorshipJokesDifficultyTinyLittle ThingsDifferent Cultures Author:Michael Emerson