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Humorous Quotes

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Humorous Quotes

“My husband taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house.”

Life Inspiration Funny House Taught Humorous Witty Divorce Housekeeping Funny Divorce Hilarious Short Divorce Lawyers

Author:Zsa Zsa Gabor

“My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.”

“Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.”

“I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me.”

People Thinking Inspirational Funny Women Married Humorous Divorce Divorced Single Life

Author:Elayne Boosler

“Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.”

Funny Success Difficult Successful Meditation Failure Drug Humorous Suicide Endure Divorce Bullying Success And Failure Medication Neurosis Funny Business

Author:Joseph Heller

“Some jobs are worse than actual wives. Ad agency vs. Matrimony, for instance: Even the most capricious and demanding spouse is not going to divorce you for refusing to spend forty hours a week making up lies about toilet paper.”

Source: The Bachelor Home Companion: A Practical Guide to Keeping House Like a Pig

“For those who believe in the quote, Laughter is the best medicine and are looking for a divorce quote on the lighter side, the following divorce sayings range from mildly humorous to outrageously funny: Men are just like a book - with a beginning, middle and an end.”

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Author:Pamela Anderson