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Lol Quotes

“It's not such a huge deal when this happens at a 7-Eleven. It's pretty huge, though, when you spend the entire job interview trying not to come across like a box of hair and you come across like a box of hair.”

TrueLolAugusten Burroughs
Book:This Is How: Proven Aid in Overcoming Shyness, Molestation, Fatness, Spinsterhood, Grief, Disease, Lushery, Decrepitude & More. For Young and Old Alike.
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“What are you doing here?” Prince Sulien asks, ignoring my inquiry, an edge to his words. His irritated tone helps to snap me from my dirty thoughts. A little. “I don’t know what I’m doing here. Maybe I was just drawn to your room by some kind of magical force,” I tell him sarcastically. Prince Zane smiles seductively. “My room’s across the hall… If you ever feel a magical force and want to head there, you’re welcome.”

MatesSeductionLolReverse HaremPrincesLove ItWinter CourtHis Turn
Book:Shadow of the Crown
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“Logan studied him for a moment. “What exactly is your power?” “Staying alive,” Cristiano answered. “You’d better be sure she does,” Ayden said. “Stay alive, that is, because if anything happens to her, Sicarius or not, I’m coming for you.” After a beat, Matthias added, “And he won’t be alone.” “Ahhh,” I smiled. “I knew you cared.” Matthias groaned. “Why do you ruin everything?” “Part of my charm.”

AliveCaringLolBanterHex BoysSoft Spot
Book:Demons in Disguise
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“Is it true that spirits can’t remember anything about their human lives?” “Yes,” it answered tartly. I had never considered before now that someone would have needed to speak to a spirit to learn that information. I had always merely accepted it as one of the Clerisy’s teachings. “So you don’t know whether you were a man or a woman in life.” “No, and I don’t see why it matters. Humans are so tedious. Oh, you have dangly bits. Congratulations, you’re going to put on armor and swing a sword about. Oh, you’ve ended up with the other kind. Too bad—time to either have babies or become a nun.”

MenHumansGenderWomanLolNunSpiritsBruhVespertine
Book:Vespertine
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“I like having sex with Vale,” I blurted. Or maybe not. He froze. The sudden shock of heat in the way he stared at me tunnelled right through to my toes. He growled out a sound of desire that belonged more to an animal than an unshakable man like Vale. “That one was very personal.” Helki was flexing his fingers, trying not to turn them into fists as he swivelled a dark glower to Vale. “I liked sex with you too, Beast.” I applauded my own confidence as I managed to keep a straight face. “It was shattering." Andel groaned, his head falling into his hands. “Tell me she didn’t just make a spinal injury joke.”

SexJokeLolPunShatteringBruhSpinal Injury
Book:A World of Lost Words
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“But I must say,” Jayden smiled wistfully, “when I was a child, I had a giant stuffed whale which I slept with every night. Very soft and squishy, and Aurora, instituting the connection of our bodies last night, which I believe constitutes the term snuggling, provided the same comforting sensation as slumbering with the whale. Most enjoyable. I forgot how much I missed it.” "Giant whale.” Luna snorted a laugh. “He just called you fat.” “But snuggly,” I said. “Jayden, what are you doing here?”

JokeLolFatBruhStuff You
Book:Demons in Disguise
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“Cristiano’s grades are excellent. Your parents and I discussed getting you a tutor. Perhaps Cristiano would be just the man.” Armani gave a slight nod. “I would be most honored to do so.” Tutor me in death, maybe. “But we won’t even have the same classes! Wouldn’t another senior be better for him?” “Cristiano has your same classes. He’s a junior.” I gaped. “In what world is Armani here seventeen?” Cristiano shrugged unapologetically. “They feed us better in Italy.”

JokeLolArmaniItaliansUh Oh
Book:Demons in Disguise
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“Did you just feed off their sexual tension?" Micah asks with a laugh. "Keep it in your pants, Shera." "Oh, come on. You're telling me you can't feel it? It's impossible not to feed off of that." Anakin's mouth twitches. "Impossible?" Narrowing my gaze, I say, "Fine, not impossible, but if they're not going to act on it, I should at least get a little snack out of it.”

JokeLolBanterSuccubusSexual EnergySnack
Book:Tainted Power - The Complete Series
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“Why are breakfast food breakfast foods?" I asked them. "Like, why don't we have curry for breakfast?" "Hazel, eat." "But why?" I asked. "I mean seriously: How did scrambled eggs get stuck with breakfast exclusivity? You can put bacon on a sandwich without anyone freaking out. But the moment your sandwich has an egg, boom, it's a breakfast sandwich.” Dad answered with his mouth full. "When you come back, we'll have breakfast for dinner deal?" “I don't want to have breakfast for dinner." I answered, crossing knife and fork over my mostly full plate, "I want to have scrambled eggs for dinner without this ridiculous construction that a scrambled egg inclusive meal is breakfast even when it occurs at dinner time." “You gotta pick your battles in this world Hazel.” My mom said, “But if this is the issue you want to champion, we will stand behind you.” “Quite a bit behind you.” My dad added, and mom laughed. Anyway, I knew it was stupid, but I felt kind of bad for scrambled eggs.”

FoodComplicatedDinnerOppressionEggsBreakfastLolJohn GreenTropesThe Fault In Our Stars
Book:The Fault in Our Stars
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“This isn’t the last night, and the next person to act like Ven is going to disappear tomorrow is getting an axe to the neck.” “Typical Vold,” Andel muttered. “Jumping straight to an axe to the neck when a simple ‘please’ might have sufficed.” Vale chuckled, drawing a few surprised looks. He shrugged. “I don’t think you’ve ever said that word. I don’t think any of us have.” “Not true,” Andel defended. “Half a decade ago I asked you all to please die for good and leave me to eternal peace.” “You’re right,” Fjor muttered dully. “Manners make all the difference.”

PridePleaseMannersTensionLolBanterBrothersReverse HaremYeah Right
Book:A World of Lost Words
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“They stared at me without emotion—without recognition, almost. Even Fjor, who had dragged me beneath him, whose hot mouth had devoured mine only the night before. He narrowed his dark eyes as though he could tell I was remembering it … and he wasn’t happy about it. I smirked in response. “Again?” Andel suddenly snapped, looking between me and Fjor, his eyes darkening in fury. “Again?” Helki repeated, confused. “It would seem so.”

KissJealousLolAgainHaremHe S Ahead
Book:A Dream of Embers
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“No way.” Fjor shook his head. “I stab things. I don’t discuss emotions. Stabbing is cleaner, and that’s saying something, because stabbing is generally quite messy, as far as coping mechanisms go.” “Stabbing isn’t a coping mechanism,” I stubbornly pointed out. “It’s just murder.” “Or relief.” Fjor pulled out one of his daggers, caressing the blade as he looked at me in this carefully considering way that made me stumble back a step. “Or a tool to keep things the way I want them,” he added slowly. “How—” Vidrol deadpanned, glancing from Fjor to me. “How did you ever get her to kiss you?”

KissReliefLolCoping MechanismStabIncredulousA Lapse In JudgementHe Needs TherapyHe S Asking The Bigger QuestionShe S As Psychotic As Them
Book:A Castle of Ash
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“Where’s the pizza?” Something warm and furry came and leaned against my right leg. I reached down to pet Rocky, a black lab who was going gray around his eyes and muzzle. “Rocky wants to know where the pizza is, too.” “He’s the reason the food is in the kitchen. Last time we kept it out here on the picnic table, he helped himself to half of a large bacon pepperoni pizza and then he threw up in my mom’s closet. She was cleaning dog barf out of her shoes for days.” I squatted down and rubbed Rocky’s ears. “I bet you were framed, huh, buddy?” He leaned into the ear rub and sighed. “I bet it was the cat, wasn’t it?” He sighed again like he was agreeing with me. “Nice try, but there isn’t that much barf in a cat,” Trevor said.”

RomanceYaDogsLolRomcom
Book:Boomerang Boyfriend
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“Oh, Lilias,” Uncle James groaned. “For heaven’s sake, why couldn’t you have drawn a flower or something?” He glanced at me and said, “I’m sorry – she’s going through a bit of a macabre phase at the moment. I suppose all children do at some point, don’t they?” I nodded, but couldn’t remember a time when I’d ever gone around drawing grisly murder scenes and presenting them to people as gifts.”

ChildrenHorrorMurderAwkwardLolNoMacabreDrawingsGruesome
Book:Frozen Charlotte
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