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Famous Matt Groening Quotes
“When you're as important as I am, getting your feelings hurt by me is almost an honor.”
“If people only knew how much I secretly hated them, they'd love me for holding it in.”
“I don't mind sharing the blame if she'll just admit she started it.”
“I'm not going to stop torturing myself till I figure out the cause of my pain.”
“When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle. They're on TV!”
“If God didn't want us to eat cows, why are they made out of meat?”
“I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich.”
“No matter how good you are at something, there's always about a million people better than you.”
“I'm a level 5 vegan, I don't eat anything that casts a shadow.”
“Aren't we forgeting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.”
“Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.”
“I believe that children are our future. Unless we stop them now.”
“Are we alone in an uncaring universe, or is God some kind of wiseguy?”
“I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals flaming.”
“You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head.”
“It's just hard not to listen to TV: it's spent so much more time raising us than parents have.”