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Retorts Quotes

Browse 36 quotes about Retorts.

Retorts Quotes

“I have always admired your facility for repartee, my lady. Oftentimes someone will say something to me, and later I will think up the perfect riposte—so perfect the hearer could not help but wilt, and be ashamed that they had set themselves up to receive it—but by that point it is often hours after the fact and I am lying in my bed.”

Book:Harrow the Ninth

Source: Harrow the Ninth

“Don't be fooled by those with some smarts in mockery. Some are forced into wit because they're always wrong.”

Smart Defense Wit Clever Foolishness Mockery Facade Retorts Responses Rebuttals

Author:Criss Jami

“...unfortunately, I am incapable of thinking up perfectly biting, split-second retorts, in any language. The French even have a word for this: l'esprit de l'escalier; staircase wit, something you only think of on the way out.”

Comeback Retorts

Book:I've Been Around

Source: I've Been Around

“So you're the former beauty queen Rob mentioned. Not quite what I was expecting, honey." The spell she'd cast over me lifted a bit at that remark---I didn't need her reminding me I wasn't beauty queen material. I felt Bernadette's and Adeena's influence stirring in me and returned the smirk. "Same goes for you." "What, because I'm young and Black?" "No, because you seem like you have self-respect.”

Retorts Sassiness

Book:Homicide and Halo-Halo

Source: Homicide and Halo-Halo

“You know, my dear, I insured my voice for fifty thousand dollars.”

Knows Voice Thousand Dollars Dear Fifty Retorts

Author:Miriam Hopkins

“It is never ridicule, but a compliment, that knocks a philosopher off his feet. He is already positioned for every possible counter-attack, counter-argument, and retort...only to find a big bear hug coming his way.”

Way Bigs Feet Bears Argument Philosopher Compliment Hug Ridicule Retorts Counter Attack Bear Hugs

Book:Killosophy

Source: Killosophy

“If you can somehow force a liberal into a point-counterpoint argument, his retorts will bear no relation to what you’ve said - unless you were in fact talking about your looks, your age, your weight, your personal obsessions, or whether you are a fascist. In the famous liberal two-step, they leap from one idiotic point to the next, so you can never nail them. It’s like arguing with someone with Attention Deficit Disorder.”

Ifs Looks Said Two Facts Age Next Force Attention Talking Steps Bears Argument Weight Relation Arguing Obsession Leap Disorder Nails Deficit Fascists Idiotic Attention Deficit Disorder Retorts

Author:Ann Coulter

“If we did not know all His retorts by heart, if we had not taken the sting out of them by incessant repetition in the accents of the pulpit, and if we had not somehow got it into our heads that brains were rather reprehnsible, we should reckon Him among the greatest wits of all time. Nobody else, in three brief years, has achieved such an output of epigram.”

Ifs Knows Should Years Heart Three Jesus Christ Brain Taken Jesus Christ Wit All Time Accents Repetition Pulpit Output Epigrams Incessant Retorts

Author:Dorothy L. Sayers

“Other Republican candidates may retort to personal attacks and negative ads.”

May Humor Political Republican Negative Candidates Ads Political Humor Bushism Retorts Personal Attacks

Author:George W. Bush

“What is the use of assuring Fundamentalists that science is compatible with religion. They retort at once, Certainly not with our religion.”

Use Atheism Positive Atheism Compatible Retorts

Author:Luther Burbank

“Someone described Providence as the baptismal name of chance; no doubt some pious person will retort that chance is the nickname of Providence.”

Persons Names Chance Doubt No Doubt Providence Chances Are Pious Nicknames Retorts

Book:The Cynic's Breviary: Maxims and Anecdotes from Nicolas de Chamfort

Source: The Cynic's Breviary: Maxims and Anecdotes from Nicolas de Chamfort

“I am the most spontaneous speaker in the world because every word, every gesture, and every retort has been carefully rehearsed.”

World Has Beens Gestures Speakers Spontaneous Retorts

Author:George Bernard Shaw

“One helpful thing to keep in mind as a retort-stopper is that you won't "win," you won't change anyone's mind, you won't change any votes, you won't make the atmosphere in the room any better, YOU won't feel any better.”

Feels Mind Winning Rooms Vote Atmosphere Helpful Retorts

Author:Carolyn Hax

“I think that Lethal Weapon-style dialogue is overused, it's a necessary aspect of high action films where you have to have the smart retort. You have to say "I'll be back baby" and stuff. It's not my style.”

Thinking Action Film Stuff Style Baby Weapons Smart Aspect Dialogue Action Films Retorts Overused Lethal Weapon

Author:George Lucas

“Look. Every partisan in every party has to learn one thing: Sometimes your people are wrong. To paraphrase an old retort, saying "My party, right or wrong" is like saying "My Kennedy, drunk or sober." Credibility is earned, and standing up and saying "Fie!" now and then reinforces your truthfulness.”

People Looks Sometimes Party One Thing Standing Drunk Now And Then Sober Credibility Truthfulness Partisans Paraphrase Retorts

Author:James Lileks

“Well, remember what you said, because in a day or two, I'll have a witty and blistering retort! You'll be devastated THEN”

Wells Said Two Remember Witty Devastated Retorts Calvin And Hobbes Friendship

Author:Bill Watterson

“Alec muttered a retort into his coffee. It rhymed with something that sounded a lot more like "ducking glass mole.”

Glasses Coffee Moles Retorts

Book:Cassandra Clare: The Mortal Instrument Series (3 books): City of Bones; City of Ashes; City of Glass

Source: Cassandra Clare: The Mortal Instrument Series (3 books): City of Bones; City of Ashes; City of Glass

“One doesn't come to Italy for niceness," was the retort; "one comes for life. Buon giorno! Buon giorno!”

Niceness Retorts

Book:A Room With A View: England Literature

Source: A Room With A View: England Literature

“When we stop believing in gods we can start believing in their stories, I retort. There are of course no such things as miracles, but if there were and so tomorrow we woke up to find no more believers on earth, no more devout Christians, Muslims, Hindus, Jews, why then, sure the beauty of the stories would be a thing we could focus on because they wouldn't be dangerous any more, they would become capable of compelling the only belief that leads to truth, that is, the willing, disbelieving of the reader in a well-told tale.”

Ifs Believe Wells Stories Would Be Earth Christian Courses Belief Focus Dangerous Willing Reader Tomorrow Capable Miracle Jew Believer Tales Believe In God Compelling Retorts

Author:Salman Rushdie

“Even the financial disclosure statements that political bloggers were required to post hadn't stemmed the suspicion that people's opinions weren't really their own. "Who's paying you?" was a retort that might follow any bout of enthusiasm, along with laughter - who would let themselves be bought?”

People Might Political Opinion Laughter Financial Statements Enthusiasm Posts Suspicion Disclosure Bloggers Retorts

Book:A Visit From the Goon Squad

Source: A Visit From the Goon Squad

“"This is me, remember!" retorts Suze. "I know what you're like! You used to throw all your bank statements into the trash and hope a complete stranger would pay off your bills!" This is what happens. You tell your friends your most personal secrets, and they use them against you.”

Knows Use Happens Remember Used Pay Secret Like You Bills Stranger Statements Trash This Is Me Retorts

Author:Sophie Kinsella

“One of the stall doors swings open and a fortyish-year-old woman walks out tucking her shirt into her jeans. Her heavy lined eyes land on Seth. "This is the women's restroom." She points a finger to the door. "Can't you read?" "Can't you see that everyone in this club is about twenty years younger than you?" Seth retorts, turning to the mirror. With his pinkie, he messes with bangs. "Now if you'll excuse us, we're going to have some fun.”

Ifs Years Eye Fun Walks Doors Land Twenties Mirrors Fingers Clubs Excuse Heavy Mess Shirts Swings Jeans Bangs Old Woman Restroom Retorts

Book:The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden

Source: The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden

“The thing of courage As rous'd with rage doth sympathise, And, with an accent tun'd in self-same key, Retorts to chiding fortune.”

Self Courage Keys Fortune Rage Accents Retorts

Book:Troilus and Cressida

Source: Troilus and Cressida

“Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.”

“A woman springs a sudden reproach upon you which provokes a hot retort, and then she will presently ask you to apologize.”

Asks Women Spring Hot Apologizing Provoking Reproach Retorts

Book:Mark Twain's notebook

Source: Mark Twain's notebook

“REPARTEE, n. Prudent insult in retort. Practiced by gentlemen with a constitutional aversion to violence, but a strong disposition to offend. In a war of words, the tactics of the North American Indian.”

War Strong Violence Indian Gentleman Insult Disposition Tactics Prudent Aversion American Indian Repartee Retorts

Book:The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

Source: The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

“Audiences are always better pleased with a smart retort, some joke or epigram, than with any amount of reasoning.”

Audience Amount Smart Jokes Reasoning Epigrams Retorts

Book:The Living of Charlotte Perkins Gilman: An Autobiography

Source: The Living of Charlotte Perkins Gilman: An Autobiography

“Every time we hold our tongues instead of returning the sharp retort, show patience with another's faults, show a little more love and kindness, we are helping to stock-pile more of these peace-bringing qualities in the world instead of armaments for war.”

World Love Littles War Helping Shows Peace Quality Kindness Faults Tongue Love And Kindness Armament Retorts

Author:Connie Foster

“Can you nominate in order now the degrees of the lie? I will name you the degrees. The first, the Retort Courteous; the second, the Quip Modest; the third, the Reply Churlish; the fourth, the Reproof Valiant; the fifth; the Countercheck Quarrelsome; the sixth, the Lie with Circumstance; the seventh, the Lie Direct. All these you may avoid but the Lie Direct; and you may avoid that too, with an If. . . . Your If is the only peace-maker; much virtue in If.”

Ifs Firsts May Lying Order Names Peace Virtue Circumstances Degrees Direct Thirds Makers Fourth Modesty Modest Fifth Courteous Valiant Quip Reproof Retorts

Author:William Shakespeare

“Instant enlightenment. A quintessential modernism, culture and religion accommodated to the age of fast food and bumper stickers. But psyche and spirit are not so exempt from the natural domain that they can simply produce self-change instantaneously, on demand. Wisdom precipitates through a notoriously slow apparatus of retorts and flasks, and it has to find receptive ground only in a properly seasoned mind.”

“More than once I've had discussions with persons who say things based on a misunderstanding. 'Oh you Catholics worship images.' No we don't, 'yes you do,' no we don't, 'yes you do,' no we don't! The final retort to that is: I have a doctorate in Catholic theology that I have earned the hard way - by sitting in university classrooms for twelve years. I know what we believe! You get a doctorate in Catholic theology? What do you know about it? Nothing! You don't know anything about it. You're saying things that are born of misunderstanding or ignorance.”

Knows Way Years Believe Persons Hard Born Ignorance Worship Sitting Catholic Finals University Theology Discussion Do You Know Classroom Twelve Misunderstanding Hard Way Doctorates Retorts

Author:John Corapi

“I am aware that many critics consider the conditions in the stars not sufficiently extreme . . . the stars are not hot enough. The critics lay themselves open to an obvious retort: we tell them to go and find a hotter place.”

Enough Stars Conditions Hot Lays Critics Obvious Extremes Hotter Retorts

Author:Arthur Eddington

“A philosopher who says, 'There are no truths, only interpretations,' risks the retort: 'Is that true, or only an interpretation?'”

Risk Philosopher Interpretation Retorts

Author:Roger Scruton

“The willing sacrifice of the innocents is the most powerful retort to insolent tyranny that has yet to be conceived by God or man.”

Men Powerful Sacrifice Willing Tyranny Most Powerful Insolent Retorts

Author:Mahatma Gandhi

“To the old our mouths are always partly closed; we must swallow our obvious retorts and listen. They sit above our heads, on life's raised dais, and appeal at once to our respect and pity.”

Mouths Raised Obvious Pity Appeals Retorts

Book:The Complete Works of Robert Louis Stevenson: Novels, Short Stories, Poems, Plays, Memoirs, Travel Sketches, Letters and Essays (Illustrated Edition): The Entire Opus of Scottish novelist, poet, essayist and travel writer, containing Treasure Island, Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, Kidnapped, Catriona and A Child's Garden of Verses

Source: The Complete Works of Robert Louis Stevenson: Novels, Short Stories, Poems, Plays, Memoirs, Travel Sketches, Letters and Essays (Illustrated Edition): The Entire Opus of Scottish novelist, poet, essayist and travel writer, containing Treasure Island, Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, Kidnapped, Catriona and A Child's Garden of Verses

“Science is not, as so many seem to think, something apart, which has to do with telescopes, retorts, and test-tubes, and especially with nasty smells, but it is a way of searching out by observation, trial and classification; whether the phenomena investigated be the outcome of human activities, or of the more direct workings of nature's laws. Its methods admit of nothing untidy or slip-shod; its keynote is accuracy and its goal is truth.”