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Funny Chocolate Quotes

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Funny Chocolate Quotes

“I never do any television without chocolate. That's my motto and I live by it. Quite often I write the scripts and I make sure there are chocolate scenes. Actually I'm a bit of a chocolate tart and will eat anything. It's amazing I'm so slim.”

Writing Bits Television Scene Scripts Live By Chocolate Motto Slim My Motto Tarts Funny Chocolate

Author:Dawn French

“After about 20 years of marriage, I'm finally starting to scratch the surface of what women want. And I think the answer lies somewhere between conversation and chocolate.”

“When the going gets tough, the tough take a nap.”

“Coffee and chocolate-the inventor of mocha should be sainted.”

Should Coffee Chocolate Inventor Funny Chocolate Mocha

Author:Cherise Sinclair

“Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can't remember what they are.”

Two Funny Remember Brain Produce Computer Reactions Culinary Chocolate Pot Marijuana Dessert Similarity Researchers Cannabis Funny Marijuana Funny Weed Funny Chocolate Sweets And Desserts

Author:Matt Lauer

“Look, there's no metaphysics on earth but chocolates.”

“I owe it all to little chocolate donuts.”

Littles Chocolate Stewardship Donuts Funny Chocolate

Author:John Belushi

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.”

Love Needs Littles Funny Women Hurt Love Is Food Health Humorous Witty Chocolate Now And Then Valentine Valentine's Day I Love You Dessert Best Love Funny Love Cartoonist Cute Love Food Love Inspiring Love Food And Drink Love Is All You Need Funny Food Funny Valentines Day Valentine Love Valentines Day Love Romantic Valentines Day Funny Valentine St Valentine Happy Valentines Chocolate Cake Happy Valentines Day Cute Valentines Day Funny Easter Happy Valentines Day Funny Valentines Day Cards Be My Valentine Sweet Valentine Yummy Best Food Chocolate Chips Funny Single Valentines Day Funny Chocolate Valentines Day Special Humorous Love Cute Valentine Short Valentines Day Friend Valentine Funny Valentines Day Card Valentines Greetings Short Valentine Funniest Love Sweets And Desserts Box Of Chocolates Chocolate Bars Humorous Valentine Sweet Valentines Day Food And Love Funny Romantic Love Chocolates Love Line Valentine Special Valentine Card Perfect Food

Author:Charles M. Schulz

“Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands - and then eat just one of the pieces.”

“Anything is good if it's made of chocolate.”

Ifs Made Food Chocolate Weight Loss Funny Chocolate

Author:Jo Brand

“What you see before you, my friend, is the result of a lifetime of chocolate.”

Results My Friends Lifetime Chocolate Chocolate Cake Yummy Funny Chocolate

Author:Katharine Hepburn

“As with most fine things, chocolate has its season. There is a simple memory aid that you can use to determine whether it is the correct time to order chocolate dishes: any month whose name contains the letter A, E, or U is the proper time for chocolate.”

“When the going gets tough, the tough get a librarian.”

“My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished 2 bags of M&M's and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.”

Way Inspirational Feels Humor Today Funny Peace Achieve Food Finished Inner Peace Bags Chocolate Cake Fitness Feel Better Therapists Chocolate Cake Funny Chocolate

Author:Dave Barry

“Your hand and your mouth agreed many years ago that, as far as chocolate is concerned, there is no need to involve your brain.”

Needs Years Hands Brain Mouths Concerned Years Ago Chocolate Yummy Funny Chocolate

Book:Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down

Source: Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down

“Exercise is a dirty word. Every time I hear it I wash my mouth out with chocolate.”

“The greatest tragedies were written by the Greeks and Shakespeare...neither knew chocolate.”

Written Tragedy Greek Chocolate Funny Chocolate

Author:Sandra Boynton

“When we don't have the words chocolate can speak volumes.”

Speak Chocolate Volume Funny Chocolate

Book:Backwater

Source: Backwater

“The 12-step chocolate program: NEVER BE MORE THAN 12 STEPS AWAY FROM CHOCOLATE!”

Steps Food Program Chocolate Indulgence Dessert Yummy Funny Chocolate Sweets And Desserts 12 Step

Author:Terry Moore

“Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals.”

Ifs Children Remember Food Cooking Finished Your Children Culinary Chocolate Cereal Funny Chocolate

Author:Robert Orben

“My momma always said, "Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."”

“Chocolate says "I'm sorry" so much better than words.”

Forgiveness Sorry Chocolate Apology Apologizing I'm Sorry Saying Sorry Saying I'm Sorry Funny Chocolate I'm So Sorry

Author:Rachel Vincent

“When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.”

“When the going gets tough, the tough eat ribs.”

“When the going gets tough, the tough go drinking.”

“When the going gets tough, the tough reinvent.”

Source: Workin' It!: RuPaul's Guide to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Style

“Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs in one go.”

Food Travel Eating Definitions Boxes Chocolate Italian Rome Venice Brownies Funny Chocolate Sweets And Desserts Box Of Chocolates Funny Journey Eating Chocolate

Author:Truman Capote

“You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.”

Knows Feelings Comedy Eating Sitting Genuine Bars Odd Chocolate Candy Toilets Candy Bar Funny Chocolate Chocolate Bars Eating Chocolate

Book:Napalm & Silly Putty

Source: Napalm & Silly Putty

“The superiority of chocolate (hot chocolate), both for health and nourishment, will soon give it the same preference over tea and coffee in America which it has in Spain.”

Giving America Hot Coffee Tea Chocolate Superiority Preference Spain Nourishment Hot Chocolate Funny Chocolate Cacao

Author:Thomas Jefferson

“Caramels are only a fad. Chocolate is a permanent thing.”

Permanent Chocolate Fads Caramel Funny Chocolate Permanent Things

Author:Milton S. Hershey

“Chocolate is a perfect food, as wholesome as it is delicious, a beneficent restorer of exhausted power...it is the best friend of those engaged in literary pursuits.”

Perfect Pursuit Engaged Chocolate Exhausted Delicious Funny Chocolate Perfect Food Wholesome Food

Author:Justus von Liebig

“Other things are just food. But chocolate's chocolate.”

Chocolate Funny Chocolate

Book:The Chocolate Touch

Source: The Chocolate Touch

“What use are cartridges in battle? I always carry chocolate instead.”

Use Wise Battle Chocolate Funny Chocolate

Book:The Collected Works of George Bernard Shaw: Plays, Novels, Articles, Lectures, Letters and Essays: Pygmalion, Mrs. Warren’s Profession, Candida, Arms and The Man, Man and Superman, Caesar and Cleopatra, Androcles And The Lion, The New York Times Articles on War, Memories of Oscar Wilde and more

Source: The Collected Works of George Bernard Shaw: Plays, Novels, Articles, Lectures, Letters and Essays: Pygmalion, Mrs. Warren’s Profession, Candida, Arms and The Man, Man and Superman, Caesar and Cleopatra, Androcles And The Lion, The New York Times Articles on War, Memories of Oscar Wilde and more

“Chocolate is cheaper than therapy, and you don't need an appointment.”

Needs Therapy Chocolate Cheaper Appointments Yummy Funny Chocolate

Book:Lucky Harbor Collection 2: Lucky In Love, At Last, Forever And A Day

Source: Lucky Harbor Collection 2: Lucky In Love, At Last, Forever And A Day

“There's nothing better than a good, blind referee.”

“Carob is a brown powder made from the pulverized fruit of a Mediterranean evergreen. Some consider carob an adequate substitute for chocolate because it has some similar nutrients (calcium, phosphorus), and because it can. when combined with vegetable fat and sugar, be made to approximate the colour and consistency of chocolate. Of course, the same arguments can as persuasively be made in favour of dirt.”

Made Courses Food Color Argument Fruit Favors Fats Brown Chocolate Substitutes Vegetables Sugar Dirt Consistency Adequate Powder Nutrients Calcium Funny Chocolate Evergreens Phosphorus

Author:Sandra Boynton

“Your face makes my soul want to eat chocolate pudding!”

Want Soul Faces Comedy My Soul Chocolate Your Face Pudding Funny Chocolate Eating Chocolate Chocolate Pudding

Author:Andy Milonakis

“Don't wreck a sublime chocolate experience by feeling guilty.”

Feelings Guilty Chocolate Sublime Wrecks Dessert Feeling Guilty Yummy Gourmet Food Funny Chocolate Sweets And Desserts

Author:Lora Brody

“"Chocolate - The Consuming Passion" was written for the Chocolate Elite - the select millions who like chocolate in all its infinite variety, using 'like' as in 'I like to breathe.'”

Passion Millions Written Infinite Breathe Variety Chocolate Elites Select Consuming Funny Chocolate

Author:Sandra Boynton

“I could give up chocolate but I'm not a quitter.”

Giving Giving Up Chocolate Quitter Yummy Funny Chocolate Love Chocolates

Author:Lora Brody

“In the cookie of life, friends are the chocolate chips.”

Chocolate Chips Cookies Friendship Memories One Line Friendship Chocolate Chips Funny Chocolate Chocolate Chip Cookies

Author:Salman Rushdie