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Humorous Quotes

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Humorous Quotes

“"Next," said Mrs Wilfer with a wave of her gloves, expressive of abdication under protest from the culinary throne, "I would recommend examination of the bacon in the saucepan on the fire, and also of the potatoes by the application of a fork. Preparation of the greens will further become necessary if you persist in this unseemly demeanour."”

Source: THE GREATEST DICKENS CLASSICS (Illustrated Edition): Oliver Twist, The Pickwick Papers, Great Expectations, A Tale of Two Cities, Hard Times, David Copperfield, A Christmas Carol, Bleak House, Little Dorrit, Our Mutual Friend, The Life of Dickens

“Food is an important part of a balanced diet.”

“Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.”

“American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it.”

Problem Funny America Products Humorous Including Fats Consumers Culinary No Problem

Author:Dave Barry

“Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is wiser not to stir them.”

Memories Food Humorous Cooking Restaurants Culinary Soup

Author:P. G. Wodehouse

“I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.”

Humor Funny Food Humorous Cooking Restaurants Nonsense Culinary Breakfast Renaissance Toasts Funny Life Funny One Liner Breakfast Being Important Italian Renaissance Breakfast Food French Toast British Comedy

Author:Steven Wright

“I am not a glutton - I am an explorer of food”

Funny Power Food Humorous Cooking Culinary Weight Loss Explorers

Author:Erma Bombeck

“Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.”

“Coffee isn't my cup of tea.”

Funny Food Humorous Cooking Coffee Cups Tea Culinary Hilarious Cups Of Tea Funny Friend

Author:Samuel Goldwyn

“Sacred cows make the best hamburger.”

Funny Religion Food Humorous Sacred Cooking Witty Culinary Cows Hamburgers Funny Food Sacred Cows

Book:Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist

Source: Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist

“I don't like spinach, and I'm glad I don't, because if I liked it I'd eat it, and I just hate it.”

Ifs Hate Justice Food Humorous Cooking Glad Culinary Spinach

Author:Clarence Darrow