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Famous Dennis Miller Quotes
“Should I really care what kind of beer frogs recommend?”
“Liberals always feel your pain. Unless of course, they caused it.”
“Some people like M&Ms plain, and some people like them with nuts.”
“American's could be any more self absorbed if they were made of equal parts water and paper towel.”
“Pat Buchanan is so homo-phobic, he blames global warming on the AIDS quilt.”
“I don't need to be born again. I got it right the first time.”
“It's foolish to be prejudiced. There are so many reasons to hate people on an individual basis.”
“I think we have to help the helpless. The clueless? I don't give a rat's ass about the clueless.”
“The world is so ass-backwards it almost makes you wish you were dyslexic.”
“Is global warming new? I don't know. When I was young I remember the sun being hot.”
“Growing up, my family wasn't very tight. We were more like a tour group with secrets.”
“If you're a man and you have big tits, don't wear a tight T-shirt, okay? It confuses the children!”
“Parenting is the easiest job to get - you just have to screw up once and it's yours.”
“I used to be sceptic, but not anymore, because now I am positive that I'm getting screwed.”
“To me, nature always appears more unbalanced than Gary Busey with a clogged Eustachian tube.”