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Famous Phyllis Diller Quotes
“All I ever learned at my mother's knee was what a bony knee looked like.”
“I am descended from a very long line my mother once foolishly listened to.”
Source: Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse: My Life in Comedy
“My mother-in-law buys her coats in a carper shop. She wears a 9x12.”
“I got my first laugh when my mother entered me in a baby contest.”
“I'd love to slit my mother-in-law's corsets and watch her spread to death.”
“I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.”
“My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee.”
“My mother hated me. Once she took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle”