Best Drinking Problem Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings

“Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and answer to, all of life's problems.”

Problem Humor Causes Answers Food Alcohol Drinking Alcohol Beer Drinking Funny Alcohol Alcohol Drinking Alcohol And Life Drinking Problem

Author:Matt Groening

“Simon Gray, I decided when I first witnessed this frog into prince transformation, did not have a drinking problem. He had a drinking solution.”

Firsts Problem Solutions Decided Transformation Drinking Gray Frogs Drinking Problem

Book:The Fry Chronicles: An Autobiography

Source: The Fry Chronicles: An Autobiography

“Every day we learn more and more about this wacky Osama bin Laden. He lives in a cave and at one time he was a womanizer. But now he has settled down with his five wives and 26 kids, so that's now all over. ... He also had a drinking problem at one time. I believe he went through 'Jihab'”

Believe Problem Kids I Believe Five Wife Drinking One Time Caves Bin Laden Osama Bin Laden Wacky Womanizer Drinking Problem

Author:David Letterman

“Everybody goes through divorces. There's millions of people that have drinking problems. There's people that their weight goes up and down, just like mine. It's just life. And I think people relate to that. I really do.”

People Thinking Problem Millions Mines Weight Drinking Divorce Relate Up And Down Drinking Problem

Author:John Daly

“Well I have a drug history and a public drinking problem and I am not the healthiest guy. So they just ran that I died of a drug overdose.”

Wells Problem Guy Drug Died Drinking Ran Overdose Drinking Problem

Author:Artie Lange

“Cigarettes, cigarettes were much tougher. Booze was tough And I had a real drinking problem before as we discovered in the hospital really, but the cigarettes are much tougher and to tell you the truth.”

Real Problem Tough Drinking Hospitals Cigarette Booze Drinking Problem

Author:Joe Eszterhas

“I've never gotten in too much trouble with alcohol. I've never had a drinking problem, really.”

Problem Too Much Trouble Drinking Alcohol Drinking Problem

Author:Kurt Vile

“The sober guy is always going to have this air of arrogance or self-righteousness, but it's not my intention. I just knew that if I drank, I'd have a drinking problem.”

Ifs Self Problem Guy Air Intention Drinking Arrogance Righteousness Sober Drank Self Righteousness Drinking Problem

Author:Bradford Cox

“Because Brenda [Carlin] had a drinking problem along with the coke, she had to hit bottom first. Most alcoholics do. And for her, bottom was an automobile accident that almost landed her in jail.”

Firsts Problem Drinking Bottom Accidents Jail Alcoholics Automobile Coke Drinking Problem

Author:George Carlin

“The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.”

“That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.”

“I don't have a drinking problem 'Cept when I can't get a drink.”

I Can Problem Drink Drinking Alcohol Drinking Alcohol Funny Drinking Funny Alcohol Alcohol Drinking Alcohol And Life Don't Drink Alcohol Drinking Problem Drinking Cheers

Author:Tom Waits

“Fill with mingled cream and amber, I will drain that glass again. Such hilarious visions clamber Through the chamber of my brain — Quaintest thoughts — queerest fancies Come to life and fade away; What care I how time advances? I am drinking ale today.”

Source: Delphi Complete Works of Edgar Allan Poe (Illustrated)

“I'm glad I don't have a drinking problem,' I confided, 'because I don't think I'd ever be able to quit.”

Thinking Problem Able Drinking Quitting Glad Drinking Problem

Book:Lucky Man: A Memoir

Source: Lucky Man: A Memoir

“So what are you planning to do with the rest of your life? Develop a drinking problem. More Scotch, please.”

Problem Please Drinking Alcohol Planning Rest Of Your Life Scotch Drinking Problem

Book:The Marching Season

Source: The Marching Season

“I'm not a writer with a drinking problem, I'm a drinker with a writing problem.”

Writing Problem Drinking Drinkers Drinking Problem

Author:Dorothy Parker

“He took a long drink, then grimaced. “I do not have a drinking problem,” he announced, his voice needlessly loud. “I have a Churchillian relationship with alcohol: I can crack jokes and govern England and do anything I want to do. Except not drink.”

Want Long I Can Problem Voice Drink Jokes England Drinking Alcohol Loud Cracks Drinking Problem

Book:The Fault in Our Stars

Source: The Fault in Our Stars

“You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name -- and you've never been to that bar before.”

Knows Problem Humor Funny Names Drinking Bars Bartender Drinking Problem

Author:Zach Galifianakis

“Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today.”

Source: Delphi Complete Works of Edgar Allan Poe (Illustrated)

“I'm dealing with my drinking problem and I have a reputation for getting things done.”

Done Problem Drinking Reputation Beer Things Done Getting Things Done Drinking Problem

Author:Brian Clough

“Our children don't have to have drinking problems. They don't have to go through divorce or live defeated lives. You can be the one to stir them up, shake them up, and tell them there is a champion inside of them just waiting to come out. Tell them God has a plan for their lives, and they are destined to do greater things than we ever thought of doing.... You can decide to be the role model and reverse your whole generational pattern from a bad one to a good one.”

“Maybe some folks are alcoholics and others are just voluntary drunks. Maybe some folks drink due to body chemistry and others due to their lazy characters. Maybe some have drinking problems, while others have problems enough to drink.”

Enough Character Problem Body Drink Drinking Folks Dues Lazy Chemistry Alcoholics Drinking Problem Body Chemistry

Book:I Lived to Tell It All

Source: I Lived to Tell It All

“I don't have a drinking problem. I drink. I get drunk. I fall down, no problem.”

Problem Funny Fall Drink Drinking Drunk No Problem Falling Down Drinking Problem

Author:George Burns

“I'd read somewhere that nine out of ten adults in Alaska had a drinking problem. I could believe it. Snow, ice, sleet, wind, the dark night of the soul: what else were you supposed to do?”

Believe Soul Problem Night Dark Wind Ten Adults Drinking Nine Snow Ice Alaska Dark Night Dark Night Of The Soul Sleet Drinking Problem

Book:T.C. Boyle Stories

Source: T.C. Boyle Stories

“It's a lot more fun for actors to cry and rant and rave, or have a drug problem or a drinking problem.”

Problem Actors Fun Cry Drug Drinking Rant Rave Drinking Problem Ranting And Raving

Author:Jerry Orbach