Best Shots Drinking Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings

“Work like you don't need the money.”

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Author:Joseph Joubert

“Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.”

Source: The Good Life According to Hemingway

“An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.”

Source: The Good Life According to Hemingway

“My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars.”

“You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.”

“If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.”

“Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.”

“Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.”

“Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.”

“Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.”

“Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”

“An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.”

“I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.”

“Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.”

Source: Bite-Size Twain: Wit and Wisdom from the Literary Legend

“The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.”

“Work is the curse of the drinking classes.”

“The worst thing about some men is that when they are not drunk they are sober.”

“I drink to make other people more interesting.”

“Good people drink good beer.”

“It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.”

“Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; the best of life is but intoxication.”

“I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.”

“I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I had lost exactly two weeks.”

“No animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness - or so good as drink.”

“I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on.”

“I drink to make other people interesting.”

Source: The World of George Jean Nathan: Essays, Reviews, & Commentary

“I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.”

“He that drinks fast, pays slow.”

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Author:Benjamin Franklin

“Even though a number of people have tried, no one has yet found a way to drink for a living.”

“Alcohol is a very necessary article. It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the morning.”

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Author:George Bernard Shaw

“You can't be a real country unless you have a beer.”

Source: Real Frank Zappa Book

“When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!”

“I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.”

“My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.”

“Wine is constant proof that God loves us and likes to see us happy.”

“I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.”

“I feel sorry for people who do not have a Bible to lean on.”

Source: What Every Christian Ought to Know

“A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.”

“Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.”