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Mental Health Quotes

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Mental Health Quotes

“Having DID is, for many people, a very lonely thing. If this book reaches some people whose experiences resonate with mine and gives them a sense that they aren't alone, that there is hope, then I will have achieved one of my goals. A sad fact is that people with DID spend an average of almost seven years in the mental health system before being properly diagnosed and receiving the specific help they need. During that repeatedly misdiagnosed and incorrectly treated, simply because clinicians fail to recognize the symptoms. If this book provides practicing and future clinicians certain insight into DID, then I will have accomplished another goal. Clinicians, and all others whose lives are touched by DID, need to grasp the fundamentally illusive nature of memory, because memory, or the lack of it, is an integral component of this condition. Our minds are stock pots which are continuously fed ingredients from many cooks: parents, siblings, relatives, neighbors, teachers, schoolmates, strangers, acquaintances, radio, television, movies, and books. These are the fixings of learning and memory, which are stirred with a spoon that changes form over time as it is shaped by our experiences. In this incredibly amorphous neurological stew, it is impossible for all memories to be exact. But even as we accept the complex of impressionistic nature of memory, it is equally essential to recognize that people who experience persistent and intrusive memories that disrupt their sense of well-being and ability to function, have some real basis distress, regardless of the degree of clarity or feasibility of their recollections. We must understand that those who experience abuse as children, and particularly those who experience incest, almost invariably suffer from a profound sense of guilt and shame that is not meliorated merely by unearthing memories or focusing on the content of traumatic material. It is not enough to just remember. Nor is achieving a sense of wholeness and peace necessarily accomplished by either placing blame on others or by forgiving those we perceive as having wronged us. It is achieved through understanding, acceptance, and reinvention of the self.”

“It was also revealed that the reason I am cruel to others is because I have low-self-esteem. Because I don’t love myself, I am unable to understand those who do love me in spite of it all, and so I test them. “You love me even when I do this? Or this? Or this?” Even when the other person forgives me, I am unable to understand their forgiveness, and when they give up on me, I torture and console myself with the “fact” that no one could ever love me. That goddamn self-esteem. [...] Looking more closely at myself, there are parts that I've improved on. I still remain someone who is unable to love herself. But as I had that thought, I had another: light and darkness are part of the same thing. Happiness and unhappiness alternate throughout life, as in a dance. So as long as I keep going and don’t give up, surely I will keep having moments of tears and laughter. This book, therefore, ends not with answers but with a wish. I want to love and be loved. I want to find a way where I don’t hurt myself. I want to live a life where I say things are good more than things are bad. I want to keep failing and discovering new and better directions. I want to enjoy the tides of feeling in me as the rhythms of life. I want to be the kind of person who can walk inside the vast darkness and find the one fragment of sunlight I can linger in for a long time. Some day, I will.”

“Dr. Talbon was struck by another very important thing. It all hung together. The stories Cheryl told — even though it was upsetting to think people could do stuff like that — they were not disjointed They were not repetitive in terms of "I've heard this before". It was not just she'd someone trying consciously or unconsciously to get attention. really processed them out and was done with them. She didn't come up with them again [after telling the story once and dealing with it]. Once it was done, it was done. And I think that was probably the biggest factor for me in her believability. I got no sense that she was using these stories to make herself a really interesting person to me so I'd really want to work with her, or something. Or that she was just living in this stuff like it was her life. Once she dealt with it and processed it, it was gone. We just went on to other things. 'Throughout the whole thing, emotionally Cheryl was getting her life together. Parts of her were integrating where she could say,"I have a sense that some particular alter has folded in with some basic alter", and she didn't bring it up again. She didn't say that this alter has reappeared to cause more problems. That just didn't happen. The therapist had learned from training and experience that when real integration occurs, it is permanent and the patient moves on.”

“Chapter 4: Like I've Been There Before (page 94) In fact, it was a truly creative atmosphere. We could pitch jokes, and the best joke won, no matter where it came from. The craft services lady said something funny? Put it in, it didn't matter. So, not only was I there as an actor, but my creative juices were flowing, too.”

“Something was wrong, and I didn't know how to explain it in a way anyone would understand. It was as if there was an invisible thread between me and Chris, connecting us, and it didn't matter that he was over a thousand miles away in Florida. He was with me everywhere I went, invading my mind and body, stealing the life I could have had.”

“Have you ever stopped and wondered, Who would I be if I weren't anxious? Sometimes fear of the unknown is more terrifying than our current reality, even if our reality is fraught with panic and anxiety. How do you respond to change? Do you embrace it wholeheartedly, or are you resistant? Overcoming anxiety often requires stepping out of one’s comfort zone, which can be difficult and scary. However, doing it can be incredibly powerful.”

“Our bodies, in their infinite wisdom and love, are inherently designed to heal. If you cut your finger, your body will jump into action, and before you know it, that cut will be healed. Why wouldn’t it be the same with other parts of our bodies and minds?”

“When you learn how to repattern your body, you can start to experience the benefits of living in a body that feels fundamentally safe and in the present moment. No more panic out of the blue, no more fear of the fear, and no more attacks of anxiety that control your life.”

“Whether or not you choose to incorporate your illness into your core identity is totally up to you. That’s also something that may change over the course of time as your illness evolves and perhaps becomes more chronic in nature. Regardless, you are not reducible as a person to your mental illness alone, nor does your illness define your inherent worth.”

“While this (shadow) work can be difficult, it is incredibly transformative and healing. When you find yourself stuck in negative patterns or feeling worn out with your old ways of being, shadow work illuminates a healthier path forward.”

“As a Black man and therapist, I know that the ways we heal may look different from the ways mainstream wellness talks about health. Black men experience the same challenges as anyone else, but with the added pressures of racism, increased stigma, and oppression. The path to healing is different and needs to take into account our lived brealities and the complexity of contemporary Black masculinity.”

“Self-care is not a perfect journey. Different factors and barriers, including mental ones, get in the way of self-care. Even when armed with the right tools and education, you may still struggle to put some of the suggestions in this book into practice. Give yourself grace, but also hold yourself accountable. Looking after yourself can be difficult, but if you try new things, you will gain a lot. Your health will improve. Your relationships will get better. Your mental health will become more stable and secure.”

“Practicing mindfulness can seem abstract at first. It certainly was to me. But what I’ve learned is that when we use the senses we have available, we create a shortcut to present-centered living. Because the body naturally rests in the here-and-now, it proves itself a useful tool in mindfulness.”

“I spoke with one woman who would watch her narcissistic mom observe other people's insecurities and shower them with compliments and praise in those areas. Those "targets" felt loved, seen, heard. Her mom didn't care about these people.”