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P. J. O'Rourke

P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

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Famous P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

“.......the poor of the world cannot be made rich by redistribution of wealth. Poverty can't be eliminated by punishing people who've escaped poverty, taking their money and giving it as a reward to people who have failed to escape. Economic leveling doesn't work. Whether we call it Marxism, Progressive Reform, or Clintonomics, the result is the same slide into the stygian pit. Communists worship Satan; socialists think perdition is a good system run by bad men; and liberals want us to go to hell because it's warm there in the winter.”

PeopleThinkingMenWorldWantGivingMadeRunningWealthPoorResultsPovertyHellRichEconomicWorshipEconomicsRewardsWinterWarmReformSatanProgressiveCommunistWant UMarxismPitsSlidesGo To HellBad ManPerditionRedistribution Of Wealth
Book:All the Trouble in the World: The Lighter Side of Overpopulation, Famine, Ecological Disaster, Ethnic Hatred, Plague, and Poverty
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“In general, life is better than it has ever been, and if you think that, in the past, there was some golden age of pleasure and plenty to which you would, if you were able, transport yourself, let me say one single word : Dentistry.”

IfsThinkingAgeAblePastLife IsPleasureHistoryHumourLet MeGoldenPlentyTransportGolden AgeSingle WordDentistry
Book:All the Trouble in the World: The Lighter Side of Overpopulation, Famine, Ecological Disaster, Ethnic Hatred, Plague, and Poverty
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“[Kurt] Vonnegut once said, if you ever want to know who somebody is... Like you look at Richard Nixon, or Adolf Hitler, or Ralph Nader, or anybody who seems like a difficult person to understand, and is therefore not part of the pattern of human behavior. Think about who they were in high school, and they will explain themselves to you. So we got a hold of, like, 50 high-school yearbooks, including my mom's from 1925 or something, and we discovered that they're all the same.”

IfsThinkingKnowsWantHumansLooksPersonsSaidSeemsSchoolDifficultLike YouMomBehaviorHigh SchoolIncludingPatternsMy MomHuman BehaviorYearbookHigh School Yearbook
Author:P. J. O'Rourke
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“When [George W.] Bush was elected, I think they thought I would have some sort of special "in" with that administration, to provide some sort of inside poop. Which is not something I'd be interested in doing, and anyway, I didn't. I actually knew more people in his dad's administration. So it was obviously winding down at Rolling Stone, and they were having financial troubles, too. They weren't getting the advertising, and the issues were getting thin. They fired Bob Love, who'd been my editor there for a long time.”

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Author:P. J. O'Rourke
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“[Wave of bestselling conservative commentators] it's kind of like reading The Power Of Positive Thinking, or any other advice or how-to book. All they do is reassure people of their basic opinions, and then they can continue to act like they've always acted. I'd say it's time to move on to something else, but I don't know what it would be.”

PeopleThinkingKnowsKindBookWould BeMovingReadingOpinionAdvicePositive ThinkingWaveConservativeCommentatorsPower Of Positive ThinkingTime To Move On
Author:P. J. O'Rourke
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“Bob Wallace was my editor at Rolling Stone when I first started writing there, and he's a wonderful editor. I was in the Philippines during the Marcos overthrow, and I was up on what was called Smokey Mountain. I think it's gone now, but it was a garbage dump with a bunch of people living on it. I was talking to Bob on the phone, and I told him, "I'm a humorist. I can't write about this." And Bob told me to let my style be dictated by the subject, to take what I saw and write about it in the tone that it requires.”

PeopleThinkingWritingFirstsI CanTalkingGoneSawsWonderfulSubjectsStyleMountainStonesPhonesBunchToneEditorsBobRollingGarbageLiving OnDumpRolling StonesPhilippinesHumoristsMarcos
Author:P. J. O'Rourke
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“It is important to remember when reading Adam Smith or even when just thinking about Smith that the era that he lived in, we're not talking about poverty in a day when it meant not enough bedrooms for the kids, an old car, a black and white television. We're talking about a whole world where poverty meant not enough to eat.”

ThinkingWorldImportantEnoughWholeKidsRememberReadingBlackWhiteTalkingPovertyCarTelevisionWhole WorldErasAdamBlack And WhiteBedroomRemember WhenNot TalkingOld Car
Author:P. J. O'Rourke
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“I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a 'learning experience.' It makes me feel less stupid.”

ThinkingFeelsDoneComedyStupidBehaviorStupiditySillySixtyLearning Experience
Book:Give War a Chance: Eyewitness Accounts of Mankind's Struggle Against Tyranny, Injustice, and Alcohol-Free Beer
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“If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free.”

IfsThinkingInspirationalHumorCarePoliticalWaitingLibertyCostEconomicsLibertarianCommunismHealth CareLiberalismExpensiveLibertarianismFreedom And LibertyFreedom LibertyLaissez FaireLibertarian PartyEconomic FreedomLimited FreedomGreat Libertarian
Book:Age and Guile Beat Youth, Innocence, and a Bad Haircut
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“[T]he Clinton administration launched an attack on people in Texas because those people were religious nuts with guns. Hell, this country was founded by religious nuts with guns. Who does Bill Clinton think stepped ashore on Plymouth Rock? Peace Corps volunteers? Or maybe the people in Texas were attacked because of child abuse. But, if child abuse was the issue, why didn't Janet Reno tear-gas Woody Allen?”

PeopleIfsThinkingChildrenDoeCountryReligiousHellIssuesRocksTearsGunAbuseBillsClintonAdministrationGasTexasNutsChild AbuseVolunteerGun ControlWoodyPeace CorpsPlymouthPlymouth Rock
Book:Age and Guile Beat Youth, Innocence, and a Bad Haircut
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“Health care is too expensive, so the Clinton administration is putting a high-powered coporate lawyer - Hillary - in charge of making it cheaper. (This is what I always do when I want to spend less money - hire a lawyer from Yale.) If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free.”

IfsThinkingWantCareWaitingCostClintonLawyerAdministrationHealth CareExpensiveCheaperYale
Book:Age and Guile Beat Youth, Innocence, and a Bad Haircut
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“If libertarianism were easy to explain, and it weren't easy to exaggerate the effects of libertarianism, I think it would have been done already. Many many very intelligent people have applied themselves to crafting an agenda that people could grab ahold of. But the problem of course is that libertarianism isn't political. It is kind of anti-political. It wants to take a lot of things out of the political arena.”

PeopleIfsThinkingWantKindHas BeensDoneProblemPoliticalCoursesEasyEffectsIntelligentAgendasLibertarianismArenaAnti Political
Author:P. J. O'Rourke
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“Mankind has invested more than four million years of evolution in the attempt to avoid physical exertion. Now a group of backward-thinking atavists mounted on foot-powered pairs of Hula-Hoops would have us pumping our legs, gritting our teeth, and searing our lungs as though we were being chased across the Pleistocene savanna by saber-toothed tigers. Think of the hopes, the dreams, the effort, the brilliance, the pure force of will that, over the eons, has gone into the creation of the Cadillac Coupe de Ville. Bicycle riders would have us throw all this on the ash heap of history.”

ThinkingInspirationalYearsDreamForceEffortMillionsGoneFourGroupsFeetMankindCreationEvolutionPureLegsTeethPairsAshesTigersBikeLungsBicycleBrillianceRidersExertionCadillacsCyclistsForce Of WillHulaSavanna
Book:Republican Party Reptile: The Confessions, Adventures, Essays and (Other) Outrages of P.J. O'Rourke
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“Think of what big governments have gotten up to in this century : not one, but two world wars, the gulag, the holocaust, aerial bombing of civilian population centers, the Berlin Wall, nuclear explosions, the post office. A wicked individual might want these, but he wouldn't have the cash and connections to get them. A villainous corporation could afford them but has to market the products. The Vietnam draft would be a tough sell for even the most fiendish businessmen. "Get shot! Get killed! Get diseases from foreign women who despise you in their hearts!"”

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Author:P. J. O'Rourke
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“I can think of a number of areas in New York where three acres of nuclear waste would make the neighborhood safer to walk around in than it is now, and better lit.”

ThinkingI CanFunnyThreeWalksNumbersNew YorkWasteHumorousAreasNuclearNeighborhoodLitAcresNuclear Waste
Book:All the Trouble in the World: The Lighter Side of Overpopulation, Famine, Ecological Disaster, Ethnic Hatred, Plague, and Poverty
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