Best Comedian Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings Page 3

Source: Treadmill to Oblivion

“There's quite an overlap between musicians - especially drummers - who have an affection and a proclivity towards comedy and comedians who fantasize about being in a band. And a lot of comics play instruments.”

Play Comedy Band Musician Instruments Affection Comedian Drummer

Author:David Cross

“If you watch the arcs of so many comedians, at some point, they just become themselves.”

Ifs Watches Comedian Arcs

Book:Sick in the Head: Conversations About Life and Comedy

Source: Sick in the Head: Conversations About Life and Comedy

“I'm a total one-hour drama addict. I think when you're a comedian, you tend towards dramas because that's the less stressful thing to watch.”

Thinking Hours Watches Drama Comedian Addict Stressful One Hour

Author:Sarah Silverman

“Not that I don't think irreverent humor and someone being filthy is funny, I just do what I do. Any comedian would admit throwing an f-bomb in there would help get a reaction. ... I'm not on a Puritanical pursuit, but when I would curse in a joke, I believe I'm not done writing it.”

Thinking Writing Believe Done Helping I Believe Jokes Pursuit Reactions Comedian Curse Bombs Throwing Filthy Irreverent

Author:Jim Gaffigan

“I'd been acting and doing stand-up in New York about eight years, getting rejected, and I finally got the opportunity to do stand-up on Letterman, which holds even more importance for me. With comedians, that's definitely the pinnacle, but being from Indiana, it was a big to-do.”

Years Bigs Opportunity Acting New York Importance Eight Comedian Rejected Indiana Pinnacle Letterman

Author:Jim Gaffigan

“Obviously those who burn to be professional jesters mean that they want to be successful comedians. And those are always an elite, microscopic portion of the population. But oh, how they try.”

Want Trying Mean Successful Population Comedian Being Successful Portions Elites Elitism Jester

Author:Dick Cavett

“There are few lonelier sights than a good comedian being funny in a movie that doesn't know what funny is.”

Knows Sight Comedian Being Funny

Book:Roger Ebert's Movie Yearbook 2007

Source: Roger Ebert's Movie Yearbook 2007

“I admit I do have some drawbacks and limitations as a candidate. Although I am a professional comedian, some of my critics maintain that this is not enough. I cannot deny that I stand before you untested and inexperienced - I only spent two years in television, never as a romantic lead or a song and dance man.”

Men Years Two Enough Song Television Critics Deny Limitation Comedian Candidates Two Years Drawbacks Song And Dance

Author:Pat Paulsen

“Well, I knew instantly when I met my wife what a good relationship it was, compared with what I had been doing for the previous 20-odd years. She is my buddy, my partner, my friend. And part of being a comedian is that it's your job to look at life and regurgitate it in a funny way, to point out its absurdities.”

Way Years Wells Looks Jobs Wife Mets My Friends My Wife Partners Comedian Odd Absurdity Buddy Good Relationship

Author:Greg Behrendt

“When another comedian has a lousy show, I'm the first one to admit it.”

Firsts Shows Comedian

Author:Jack Benny

“It's a letdown if the comedian doesn't finally actually really sit on his hat.”

Ifs Comedian Hats Letdowns

Author:Kingsley Amis

“If I want to keep working as an actor, I'm going to become a comedian who does fart jokes.”

Ifs Want Doe Actors Jokes Comedian Fart

Author:Peter Sarsgaard

“I'm a comedian, and I decided I wanted to be a comedian when I was eight years old watching old Saturday Night Live episodes. I never decided to be a rapper because I'm not a rapper.”

Years Wanted Night Decided Eight Comedian Rapper Episodes Saturday Saturday Night Saturday Night Live

Author:Andy Samberg

“As a comedian, I'm like one of those on-the-scene reporters. I will actually go and try to find disasters so I can write jokes as the disasters unfold.”

Writing Trying I Can Scene Jokes Disaster Comedian Reporters

Author:Paul Provenza

“I don't think comedians make an active decision to be a certain "persona." Comedians write the way they're going to write.”

Thinking Way Writing Certain Decision Active Comedian Persona

Author:Jim Gaffigan

“Comedians have a tendency to have a limited range, they tend to do one thing and do it very well, but it's limited.”

Wells One Thing Tendencies Comedian Range

Author:Woody Allen

“Las Vegas has become a child's picture-book dream of a city -- here a storybook castle, there a sphinx-flanked black pyramid beaming white light into the darkness as a landing beam for UFOs, and everywhere neon oracles and twisting screens predict happiness and good fortune, announce singers and comedians and magicians in residence or on their way, and the lights always flash and beckon and call.”

Source: American Gods

“The best-laid plans of mice and comedians usually wind up on the cutting-room floor.”

Rooms Cutting Plans Wind Comedian Mice Best Laid Plans

Author:Jon Stewart

“But what's true about comedians is that we've all got a huge hole in our personality. In a room of 3,000 people, we're the one person facing in the opposite direction - yet we have this overwhelming desire to be liked.”

People Persons Desire Rooms Huge Personality Opposites Holes Comedian Overwhelming Overwhelming Desire

Author:Jimmy Carr

“I think that comedians, more than any other type of celebrity, have to keep their humour and keep their feet on the ground. If they start taking themselves too seriously, they're heading for a fall.”

Ifs Thinking Fall Feet Humour Type Comedian Headings Feet On The Ground

Author:Jimmy Carr

“I'm a good counter comedian. I can just work it off with looks, or have something crazy to say back. That works for me.”

Looks I Can Crazy Comedian Working It

Author:Ice Cube

“My mother was the one who totally got behind me as far as, do things and ask questions later. My father would say, "I don't care how dirty you are up there, just be funny." Because they knew me offstage. They knew I was a good guy. They knew my whole plan of becoming the most exciting comedian, visually, ever. A real rock-and-roll stand-up comic.”

Real Whole Care Mother Guy Asks Father Behinds Plans Rocks Becoming Exciting Don't Care Comic Comedian I Don't Care Dirty Rock And Roll Good Guy

Author:Andrew Dice Clay

“I'm not a comedian. I didn't study sketch comedy; my background isn't that.”

Study Comedy Backgrounds Comedian Sketch Comedy

Author:Paul Rudd

“I always wanted to be a comedian and actor. I basically stumbled into the music medium, though. I'm OK, but that's about it. I like to think I'm good enough not to negatively affect the performance.”

Thinking Enough Wanted Actors Performances Mediums Comedian Good Enough

Author:Bo Burnham

“Rick Shapiro is a top comedian.”

Comedian

Author:Howard Stern

“The whole country was tied together by radio. We all experienced the same heroes and comedians and singers. They were giants.”

Country Whole Together Hero Radio Singers Comedian Giants Tied

Author:Woody Allen

“Everybody tells jokes, but we still need comedians.”

Needs Stills Jokes Comedian

Author:Jimmy Wales

“When I told my friends I was going to be a comedian, they laughed at me.”

My Friends Comedian Laughed

Author:Carrot Top

“I thought she was the funniest woman, and I believed being a comedian was the most exciting thing you could be.”

Funny Exciting Comedian Exciting Things

Author:Maya Rudolph

“Comedians kind of write what comes to them. You can give yourself little assignments, but it's what inspires you. So I feel like with food, it is a passion of mine. It's where my sensibility rests. I love topics that are universal, and I love stuff that doesn't alienate people.”

People Giving Feels Writing Kind Littles Passion Stuff Inspire Mines Universal Comedian Sensibility Topics Assignments

Author:Jim Gaffigan

“There is this false perception that comedians can never be serious. It's like from like the era of court jesters.”

Serious Perception Court Eras Comedian Jester Court Jester False Perception

Author:Jim Gaffigan

“You have to understand how bad I wanted to be a comedian, how much I loved doing it. I still can't believe I get to do this for a living and have people come up and want to see me.”

People Want Believe Stills Wanted Come Up Comedian

Author:Bill Burr

“I would like a ship for the hips, please. Ships and hips. Hipsters to stir with their hips on the hip ships. And, of course, hips. Yeah, hip. That's me. I also like sips. I'm a slow drinker. A sipster. I'm a sipster hipster comedian. Yeah, sips. But more hips. Hip, hipster, hip star, hiptard. Definitely.”

Courses Stars Please Yeah Ships Hips Comedian Hipster Drinkers

Author:Demetri Martin

“Standup comedians are attracted to one another because of their faults. So we're all kind of messed up in the same way, and once I was around a group of people that saw the world in a different way, it's like this is where I need to be.”

People World Way Needs Kind Different Saws Groups Faults All Kinds Comedian Different Ways Messed Up

Author:Chris Rock

“Black comics, they only watch Black comedians. You're a comedian; you're not just a Black comedian. You're a comedian. I try to get that through to everybody.”

Trying Black Watches Comedian

Author:Chris Rock

“I think anybody in front of a crowd is a comedian.”

Thinking Fronts Crowds Comedian

Author:Chris Rock

“[Being a good comedian] is a skill, but it's also a weird thing that only certain people can do. I always equate it to surgeons and how they can just cut people open and operate. Certain people are just wired differently, and I feel like comics are the same way.”

People Way Feels Certain Can Do Cutting Skills Comedian Surgeons Weird Things

Author:Nick Swardson

“I do feel good doing them [family-friendly movies], but it's not going to be my way of life. I'm a comedian.”

Way Feels Feel Good My Way Comedian Friendly

Author:Adam Sandler

“I'm perfectly happy to have the reputation as a comedian. I love comedies, I would love to be doing more comedies. But I also feel like I hit the limit on playing the girlfriend type in a lot of rom-coms that aren't actually rom-coms, but guy movies that happen to have girls in them.”

Feels Happens Guy Girl Comedy Type Limits Reputation Comedian Girlfriend

Author:Elizabeth Banks

“What great comedians, great comic writers, great comic actors do is that they just read the headlines with the right eyebrow position and it's funny.”

Actors Position Comic Comedian Eyebrows Headlines

Author:David Salle

“I think a lot of people compare female writers or female comedians to each other in a way that men are not. Male comedy writers are not scrutinized.”

People Thinking Men Way Comedy Female Males Comedian Compare Female Writers Female Comedian

Author:Mindy Kaling

“Comedians have the ability to feel other emotions.”

Feels Ability Emotion Comedian

Author:Bill Burr

“It's a great time to be a comedian because you've got so much more control. You can say what you want to. I think in the old days with the studio system the performer was a bit of an afterthought. You can be a wildcard on the internet. But if you put something on the internet once it's out there it's out there for life.”

Ifs Thinking Want Bits Internet Studios What You Want Comedian Performers Old Days Great Times Afterthought Wildcard

Author:Bill Burr

“My preference is live performance. Because you get the feedback. There's an energy. It's live theater. That's why I think actors like that. You know, musicians need it, comedians definitely need it. It doesn't matter what size and what club, whether it's 30 people in the club or 2,000 in a hall or a theater. It's live, it's symbiotic, you need it.”

People Thinking Knows Needs Matter Actors Energy Musician Performances Theater Size Clubs Comedian Halls Preference Feedback Live Performance Live Theater

Author:Robin Williams

“I have a funny sense of humor. If I was a comedian and I was up on stage, people would think that's funny, because I'm a funny comedian. I'm an entertainer.”

People Ifs Thinking Stage Comedian Sense Of Humor Entertainers Funny Comedian

Author:Lil B

“It was important to me to be cool as a comedian. I didn't want to be a crowd-pleaser who sent out the vibe of, "I need you guys." I wanted to be so cool that the audience could leave and I would still be killing, that I didn't want to have to rely on them or need them. That really appealed to me.”

Want Needs Stills Important Wanted Guy Audience Killing Crowds Comedian Rely Need You Being Cool I Need You Pleasers Crowd Pleasers

Author:Anthony Jeselnik

“I've always thought of myself as an African-American comedian, African-American man, everything.”

Men African American Comedian

Author:Jordan Peele

“At the same time, we can't blame comedians for taking time to learn. Any critic of comedy who believes that he has always, universally, been on the right side of justice is engaging in a hypocrisy that is itself a joke.”

Believe Sides Justice Comedy Jokes Blame Critics Comedian Hypocrisy Take Time Engaging

Author:Guy Branum

“I told them I wanted to be a comedian, and they laughed; I became a comedian, no one's laughing now”

Wanted Laughing Comedian Laughed

Author:Bob Monkhouse

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