Filter quotes by topic
Famous George Carlin Quotes
“Picture your grandmother in Hell, baking pies... without an oven.”
“What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?”
“This country was founded by a group of slave owners who told us that all men are created equal.”
“All patriarchal societies are either preparing for war, at war, or recovering from war.”
“Put two things together which have never been put together before, and some schmuck will buy it.”
“Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?”
Source: Napalm & Silly Putty
Source: Napalm & Silly Putty
“I am not a complete vegetarian. I eat only animals that have died in their sleep.”
Source: 3 x Carlin: An Orgy of George including Brain Droppings, Napalm and Silly Putty, and When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?
“If God is all powerful, can He make a stone so big that He Himself can't lift it?”
“In TV today, you can say I pricked my finger, but you can't say it the other way around.”