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Famous Rita Rudner Quotes
“Men like cars, women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes.”
“Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.”
“If you like easygoing, monogamous men, stay away from billionaires.”
“The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.”
“If it's attention you want, don't get involved with a man during play-off season.”
“Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.”
“Men are brave enough to go to war, but they are not brave enough to get a bikini wax.”
“All men think that they're nice guys. Some of them are not. Contact me for a list of names.”
“When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.”
“Impulse buying is not macho. Men rarely call the Home Shopping Network.”
“I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.”
“To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'”
“Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them.”
“I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.”