“Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.”
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Famous W. C. Fields Quotes
“Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.”
“A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.”
“Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.”
“I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.”