“If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.”
Sarcastic One Liners Quotes
Browse 32 quotes about Sarcastic One Liners.
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Sarcastic One Liners Quotes
“I did not climb to the top of the food chain to eat carrots.”
“Don't take life too seriously.”
Source: Workin' It!: RuPaul's Guide to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Style
“Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.”
“I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.”
“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.”
“If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.”
Source: Peter's people
“I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
Source: Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist
“Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.”
Source: The Wit and Wisdom of Mark Twain: A Book of Quotations
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”
“He has no enemies, but he is intensely disliked by his friends.”
“I don't suffer from my insanity -- I enjoy every minute of it.”
“Two wrongs don't make a right.”
Source: The GFG: The Guid Freendly Giant: The BFG in Scots
“If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.”
“The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese”
“Gods are fragile things, they may be killed by a whiff of science or a dose of common sense.”
“No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.”
“Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious.”
“I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.”
“He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.”
Source: The Churchill Wit
“Stress is when you wake up screaming and realize you haven't fallen asleep yet”
“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”
“Knowledge is realizing that the street is one way; wisdom is looking in both directions anyway.”
“The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.”
“I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.”