Humor Quotes
Browse 16077 quotes about Humor.
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Humor Quotes
“If you were to send a werewolf to the moon, would he be a werewolf permanently?”
“The service at this airport restaurant is so bad I'm starting to panic that I'm a ghost.”
“Fingernails are for opening things and toenails are for storing precious minerals off the ground.”
“I used to carry a rabbit's foot for luck. Then it was a monkey's paw. Now it's a camel's toe.”
“One good thing about being locked in a cage: No responsibility!”
“I diagnosed my loneliness as premature empty nest syndrome.”
“If you are feeling overly optimistic the Republican Candidates Debate is on.”
“My family isn't really Italian. We're more like Olive Garden Italian.”
“A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.'”
“I don't drink a lot. My family calls me an old soul. And my friends call me a pussy.”
“I wish his music came out of the closet and admit that it sucks.”
“The more developed your abs, the less time you've spent reading.”
“Have you ever noticed that your ugliest friend is most afraid of being raped?”
“Have you heard his new song? 'Cause he thinks he's a black man now.”