“To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target”
Hilarious Quotes
Browse 487 quotes about Hilarious.
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Hilarious Quotes
Source: Daphne du Maurier Omnibus 4: Rebecca; My Cousin Rachel
“If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important Rule of Beauty. “Who cares?””
“A conclusion is the place you get to when you’re tired of thinking.”
Source: Lucky Harbor Collection 1: Simply Irresistible, The Sweetest Thing, Head Over Heels
“Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched.”
Source: Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns)
“Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong. -T-Shirt”
Source: Third Grave Dead Ahead
“Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.”
Source: Seriously ... I'm Kidding
“A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.”
Source: Stay Awake: Stories
“If you even dream of beating me you'd better wake up and apologize.”
“I don't have any solution, but I certainly admire the problem.”
“Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.”
“Confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can have. It's much sexier than any body part.”
“Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.”
“The only thing that stops God from sending another flood is that the first one was useless.”
“Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate.”
“Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.”
“By the time a man realizes that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he's wrong.”
“Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?”
“Introducing 'Lite': the new way to spell 'Light'; but with twenty per cent fewer letters.”
“Bryant Gumbel's ego has applied for statehood. And if it's accepted, it will be the fifth-largest.”
“On one issue, at least, men and women agree. They both distrust women.”
Source: A little book in C major
“I just want one day off when I can go swimming and eat ice cream and look at rainbows.”
“All of 'em, any of 'em that have been in front of me over all these years.”