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Famous Steven Wright Quotes
“Whose cruel idea was it for the word “lisp” to have an “s” in it?”
“What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?”
“I named my dog Stay, so I can say, 'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!”
“If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.”
“I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone.”
“To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.”
“The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese”