Sarcastic Quotes
Browse 984 quotes about Sarcastic.
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Sarcastic Quotes
“Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.”
“Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious.”
“If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.”
“Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.”
“The worst part of success is to try to find someone who is happy for you.”
“I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.”
“Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.”
“Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?”
“Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.”
“Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.”
“What difference does it make how much you have? What you do not have amounts to much more.”
“Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.”
“Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.”
“In some families, please is described as the magic word. In our house, however, it was sorry.”
“Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did.”
“A pessimist is a man who has been compelled to live with an optimist.”
“In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.”
“You know you're getting old when everything hurts. And what doesn't hurt doesn't work.”
“No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.”
“How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.”
“If you love someone set them free. If they come back, set them on fire.”