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Mokokoma Mokhonoana Quotes

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Famous Mokokoma Mokhonoana Quotes

“There would definitely be way fewer instances of cheating, if the average couple did not have sex only when the woman feels like it.”

“Some men are dogs; some dogs are women.”

“Because he has finally realized that it is it and not him that is loved by the woman he loves, many a man is jealous of his own car, house, wardrobe, or salary.”

“Many a woman is in a relationship with or married to her man not because she loves him but only because she likes men like him.”

“Some people love but will never marry each other. Some are married to but have never loved and will never love each other.”

“Many a woman would not be in a relationship with or married to her man, if he earned half of what he earns; and many a man would not be in a relationship with or married to his woman, if he earned twice as much as he earns.”

“Immediately after a divorce or a breakup, your mind whispers that there are plenty more fish in the sea, while your heart shouts that there is only one whoever-you-just-divorced-or-broke-up-with.”

“People who are not blessed with the ability to make others laugh compensate for that by saying (or trying to say) things that are profound.”

“Some people would not be dead if they have not gotten the things or people they had prayed for.”

“A deep breath is a technique with which we minimize the number of instances where we say what we do not mean … or what we really think.”

“Every single good person is a good person for their own sake, not for the sake of humanity, not even for the sake of another human being.”

Source: The Selfish Genie: A Satirical Essay on Altruism

“No single bad person regards themselves as a bad person.”

Source: The Selfish Genie: A Satirical Essay on Altruism

“To label someone as selfless is symptomatic of having bought the preposterous claim that a human being can have great concern for other human beings and little concern for themselves, or that, when taken to extremes, a human being can have great concern for other human beings and absolutely no concern for themselves.”

Source: The Selfish Genie: A Satirical Essay on Altruism

“It is humanly impossible to be selfless. As a matter of fact, human beings are inherently selfish.”

Source: The Selfish Genie: A Satirical Essay on Altruism

“Loneliness tortures many if not most of the elderly more intensely and more frequently than it torments many if not most of us who will never be or have not yet been pushed or pulled into old age.”

Source: The Use and Misuse of Children

“Being bored is the price we pay for not being insane.”

“Most men would no longer enjoy conversing with most women if they stopped bringing their vaginas along.”

“Most women would each be left with fewer dreams or without a dream, if the institution of marriage were to be abolished.”

“Most of the very few people who would choose a good heart over riches would eventually use that to either make a lot of money, or attract men or women who are rich.”

“Some men are so indoctrinated that they sincerely believe that other than cooking and cleaning the only thing that a woman can do better than them is being a woman.”

“Looking but not seeing is the hearing but not understanding of the eye.”

“It is still cheating, even if nobody comes.”

“When you are suffering from sexual starvation, a spank or even a hug seems like a porn scene.”

“One of the most common and most dangerous misbeliefs is that it is impossible for someone to be stupid just because they are a doctor or a lawyer.”

“There probably was a time when the idea of having a toilet inside a house was repulsive.”

“An arrogant man whose arrogance we see from his own behaviour is more tolerable than a humble man whose humility we hear of from his own mouth.”

“Unbeknown to us, some of the people who we hope are missing us wherever they are do miss us; some miss someone else; and some are dead.”

Humor Funny Missing Humour Jokes Humorous Satire Aphorism Joke Exes Hilarious Aphorisms Aphorist Aphorists Miss Ex Wife Ex Ex Husband Ex Lover Long For Ex Partner

Author:Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers.”

“There would be fewer absent fathers, if straight men were turned on only by women with whom they would not mind having children.”

“Not everyone who condemns masturbation can masturbate.”

Humor Funny Humour Jokes Humorous Satire Aphorism Joke Hilarious Aphorisms Masturbation Aphorist Aphorists Self Abuse Masturbate Wanker Wanking Wank

Author:Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“Most people would rather eat inside a windowless room in which they have just defecated than eat inside one in which someone else has just farted, even if the room does not have a toilet.”

“Some people wouldn’t still be sane, if they were not religious or superstitious; some wouldn’t be disabled or dead.”

“Some people are each envious of the person they used to be.”

“A tie is what you get after ice cubes have wrestled with hot water.”

“Many a man was caused to perish by something that he and many men cherish.”

Humor Funny Prayer Humour Jokes Humorous Satire Cherish Aphorism Joke Hilarious Aphorisms Prayers Downfall Answered Prayers Aphorist Aphorists Answered Prayer Perish

Author:Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“Thanks to bad graphic design, some readers love only the electronic version of some books.”

“Some people would not have remained with their partners, if the unfortunate things that have happened to them had happened to their partners, or if the fortunate things that have happened to their partners had happened to them.”

“Passing their toilet training is the very last thing that some adults did that has made their parents proud of them.”

“We would not be ashamed of doing some of the things we do in private, if the number of sane human beings who do them in public were large enough.”

“Whenever they are condemning weaves or breast implants, some people speak so passionately that their false teeth almost fall out.”

“Even the world’s greatest actor cannot fake an erection.”

“Death would not surprise us as often as it does, if we let go of the misbelief that newborns are less mortal than the elderly.”

“Marketing is so powerful that it can make even an extremely untalented musician a one-hundred-hits wonder.”

“We are sometimes depressed by our failure to convince people who strongly believe that we are that we are definitely not depressed.”

“He with the cleanest clothes isn’t necessarily the cleanest.”

“Some men would not still be HIV negative or alive, if they had managed to sleep with some of the women with whom they want or wanted to have sex.”

“Being bigheaded can be as irritating and as dangerous as being small-minded.”

“Some disabled people spend a significant amount of their energy on trying to come across as abled or as not that disabled.”

“Most people who are would each not be in love with their partner, if they did not have the kind of genitals they have.”

“We have glorified wealth and freedom so much that it is impossible for most of us to truly believe that a man can truly be happy in a shack or within the confines of a prison cell.”

About the Author

Known for: Author
Quotes: 2171

Books & Sources

P for Pessimism: A Collection of Funny yet Profound AphorismsRelated source material

The Use and Misuse of ChildrenRelated source material

N for Nigger: Aphorisms for Grown Children and Childish Grown-upsRelated source material

On Friendship: A Satirical EssayRelated source material

The Confessions of a MisfitRelated source material

The Selfish Genie: A Satirical Essay on AltruismRelated source material

Divided & ConqueredRelated source material

On Masturbation: A Satirical EssayRelated source material

F for Philosopher: A Collection of Funny Yet Profound AphorismsRelated source material