Funny Quotes
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Funny Quotes
“Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.”
“The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.”
“We only need to wear shoes because the British built roads which hurt our feet.”
“Romance often begins by a splashing waterfall and ends over a leaky sink.”
“What did the letter O say to Q? Dude, your dikk is hanging out.”
“Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.”
“A man with a hump-backed uncle mustn't make fun of another man's cross-eyed aunt”
“A tax is a fine for doing well, a fine is a tax for doing wrong.”
“Life is full of temporary situations, ultimately ending in a permanent solution.”
“Elena, my four year old, says to me in all seriousness; "Mommy, you need to buy another baby".”
“Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.”
“Every city I go to is an opportunity to paint, whether it's Omaha or Hawaii.”
“I loved Jordan. He was one of the greatest athletes of our time.”
“I was glad to see Italy win. All the guys on the team were Italians.”